Murder is the same as suicide except the other person is doing it for you
What do you call it when a Mexican and a pedophile fight?
Alien vs Predator.
Why did the depressed person rob a bank? Because you're not killing yourself if a cop does it for you!
So, some thieves robbed me the other day. They took everything I owned, except for the soap, towels, and deodorant. Dirty bastards.
What’s the hardest thing about being a rapist? Fitting in.
Why did the picture go to jail? Cause it was framed!
Why did the skeleton not rob the bank?
He did not have the guts!
a little boy decided to burn a house down. the father put his arm around his wife, tears in his eyes, saying, "thats arson"
So I was being robbed and this guy had the gun to my head to i told him he was holding it backwards.
What type of tape do kidnappers use?
Abduct-Tape
An orphanage got robbed yesterday. Let's just say that's the second worst thing to happen to those orphans. At least they didn't end up like their parents.
Technically suicide is murder and murder is ilegal so if I kill myself my body should go to jail
A robber held up a depressed kid at gun point. The depressed kid took the gun, and said, "I'll do it myself."
What was the pedophile charged with when he was arrested? A minor offense
You know it's only considered murder if there's a body. Otherwise it's just a missing person.
Sign on my attorney's office wall: "You can't have manslaughter without laughter."
Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants... I hope they're happy now 😐
Don’t mistake my silence for weakness. No one plans a murder out loud.
Someone stole my toilet and the police have nothing to go on.
Today someone was killed with a starter pistol. Police think it might be race related.
