Crime jokes
The terrorists said over the intercom, "We're coming up to our destination, so we can't go over it, we can't go under, we have to go through it."
Chris Benoit is like a depressed orphan because he killed his family.
I saw some kids bullying a kid in a wheelchair. I grabbed the kid, pushed him down the stairs, and said, "GTA physics."
Why did the judge dismiss court when the orphan walked in?
Even a gay prison wouldn't want him.
Why did the bounty hunter not cash in an orphan?
He was not worth keeping.
It's the 1940s.
The chink was counting his shillings. The chink was bitching. His wife got raped in Nanking. The chink counts his shillings.
The chink gets sook chinged!
I broke up with my boyfriend and stole his wheelchair.
Guess who came crawling back?
POV: It's a rapists' groupchat, not a joke section. And it's SAD.
"Ahoy, Spongebob! I just committed homicide in Syria, and the one-party state is after my fucking ass! Argagagagagaga!"
Why did the ducks go to jail?
They sold quack.
Q: Why can orphans never be criminals?
A: Because they're never wanted.
What does a pirate say to the president?? Spread your legs so I can get my treasure back.
What 16 stoner rode a Derby winner?
Lester Piggott's cellmate.
Why do most orphans become criminals?
Then finally they know what it’s like to be wanted.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a dead pedophile? Nothing.
What's the best part about a dead hooker? The second hour is free!
Have you heard about the kidnapping at the goat farm?
I called that Rape Advice Line earlier today. Unfortunately, it's only for victims.
What's black on top and white on the bottom?
rape.
What do kidnappers play?
Roblox.