I'm required by law to tell you I am a registered sex offender.
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
A Souls fan raped me. He said, "Try finger, but hole."
What is orange and will soon be wearing prison orange? Trump.
Ejaculated in her braces, call that children behind bars.
How can you tell when a female was raped? She crossed herself out.
What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.
What do you call a bank robbery with MrBeast?
A donation team.
Why was Liverpool better than Man United? We won 5-0, and you have a sex offender on your team.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of the crime?
I think they just hacked the "chrime."
Why can't you solve a murder in Alabama?
All the DNA is identical and there are no dental records.
Why don't pirates take a bath before walking the plank?
'Cause they just wash up onshore.
I took my son to a driver's school and am surprised because he got his license but soon lost the privilege to drive a car because he ran over my ex on "accident."
(I gotta go pay him out of jail!)
There are people who are beautiful, and then there are people whom I won't rape.
What do you call a Terrorist in a wheel chair?
RCXD in bound
People say rape is bad. It is because I don't want STD and HIV.
People joking about 9/11.
Random kid: "You shouldn’t joke about that! I lost my dad on 9/11."
Oh.
"Yeah, he was the greatest pilot ever!"
Kid at Wish: I wish I could be Batman.
Doctor: Okay, shoots mum and dad. Doctor: I guess now you’ll have to be gay, you wanted to be like Batman.
If a woman gets raped, just walk away, don't bother. Cheer on the rapist if you want.
They believe they are equal to men, right? So they are able to fight back, right? Then prove it! My EQUALITY!
Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"
