Crime

Crime jokes

Rape

  • We shouldn't joke about rape, because rape is no laughing matter...

    Unless you're being raped by a clown.

  • 4
  • Imposter

  • In a game, there are crew members that have to keep the ship running. But little did they know, there was an imposter among them.

    Sound familiar? 🤔

    Well, in September 11th...

  • 2
  • Wine

  • Woman gets pulled over by a cop.

    Cop: "Ma'am, have you been drinking?"

    Lady: "No, officer."

    Cop: "What's that in your cup then, ma'am?"

    Lady: "Just water, officer."

    Cop: "Looks like wine to me."

    Lady: "Oh my god, Jesus did it again!"

  • 4
  • Gun

  • When the guy came in with a gun to rob the store, I said: "Hey, can I borrow that?"

    He says "yes." Me, over here, walking to the cashier and saying: "Goodbye!" He screams: "Have mercy!"

    I say: "No, not to you, to me. Say goodbye." He says: "No, don't shoot yourself!" It was too late.

  • 2
  • Parent

  • I've been looking for my parents for years.

    For the life of me, I can't remember where I hid their bodies.