Country jokes
Don't bother; just try to live in England.
Someone at school asked what makeup I was wearing.
I said, "a smile."
They are now following me around asking if my mental health is okay.
My plan to avoid them is to not go to school.
Going to school is mandatory in this country.
Can you guess my plan?
iran
What’s Mexico’s favorite sport?
Cross country.
Hell hates freezers, England, and soccer.
Memes
Q: Why aren't there any Walmarts in Afghanistan?
A: Because there's a Target on every corner.
America.
China has a population of a billion people. One billion.
That means even if you’re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.
What country did Indians invent?
Curry-a.
What happens at night in Bangladesh?
It gets Dhaka.
What's the main similarity between an elementary school math class and the USA?
The class divides.
Why can't England play chess? Because they lost their queen!
Official flag of Great Britain? The Union Jack.
Official flag of Australia? The Southern Cross.
Official flag of Canada? The Maple Leaf.
Official flag of Japan? The Sun.
Official flag of Orange County, California? The Nazi Symbol.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jets versus towers, USA lost two.
what do you call a rape victim in Ukraine?
Debris.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? They ain’t got no home to run to.
Why can’t England people play chess? They ain’t got no queen.
I would make a joke about your mom, but cows are sacred in my country.
Did you know that French fries aren't from France? They're cooked in Greece.
An American is touring the Soviet Union. A Russian takes him to a school so he can see what it's like. He asks the kids if they like the Soviet Union. All of the kids say yes, they love it. All but one. That kid bursts out crying. The American asks what's wrong, and he cries, "I want to live in the Soviet Union!"
What is the strongest weapon in India?
The red button (this is a fact).