A man is with his friend in a bar.
The friend, out of the blue asks, "Hey, what's your body count?"
Nervous, the man looks away.
The friend then says, "I'm talking about sex."
The man then turns back and mumbles, "Oh.. I thought you saw inside the basement.."
"Wait, wha.."
"What?"
How long does it take for 5 babies to die in the microwave?
I don't know, I can't count while I masturbate.......
It's the 1940s
The chink was counting his shillings The chink was bitching His wife got raped in nanking The chink counts his shillings
The chink gets sook chinged!
I have a question, does aging affect corpses too? just asking to know if I still count as a pedophile or not!
If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?
My Wife: how much do you live me?? Me:count all the stars.My Wife: aww infinity. Me:No a waste of time.
A farmer counted 196 cows in the field. But when he rounded them up, he had 200.
How many time does it take to cook a baby in a microwave?
I don’t know, I can’t count while masturbating
Emo kids counting be like: 1,2,3 come hang with me! 4,5,6 Gonna get new slits! 7,8,9 Suicide! 10,11,12 Bring some pills!
A guy goes into his attic to clean it out and finds an old oil lamp. He thinks he could sell it instead of throwing it away, so he starts to rub it and out pops this genie. The genie says to him " Thank you for awakening me, I can grant you three wishes as a token of my gratitude." The guy wishes for a billion dollars, the genie grants it. The guy then asks for a huge mansion with 2 Lamborghinis and 2 Ferraris, the genie grants it. The genie says "This is your last wish so really make this one count." The guys says "Well I've always wanted to drive out to hawaiian islands, because airplanes scare me to death, so I would want a highway that could stretch from here all the way to the islands." The Genie says "That is asking for quite a lot and I'm not sure if I can pull that off, Is there anything else you'd want?" The guy says "Well I've been married and divorced three times, and I just can't understand what I've been doing wrong. I've given my ex-wives all the love and care that I could but in the end it was never enough. I would want to have the ability to understand women. The genie thinks for a few moments and says "Do you want a three or four lane highway?"
I tried to pull (his/her) leg at the comedy club, but got arrested for sexual harassment. Does that still count as a joke? 🤣
I wa finally released from jail a year after I beat up someone on New Year’s Eve. Don’t blame me for being suspicious of an Arabian counting down from ten.
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
A MONEY MANAGER who counts BARS
Does a migit count as a orphan?
i love sucking on food because if you really think about it tittys can be counted as food so i could technicality suck on the womans tittys
Wayne Couzens the police officer who killed Sarah Everard , has been complaining about receiving a whole life Tariff for her murder ...
I think he should count his blessings , he could of had it worse ...
He could of married her !
If an emo counts down don't worry they probably have only one bullet.
yo mama so fat when she farts its counted as a new gas element
How many victims does Shaw have?
We don’t know yet it’s four years and counting.
Why was Hitler a Baka at mathematics? Because he can only count to Nein
