Comparison jokes
I thank God that I'm not as ugly as you.
What's the difference between a woman and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
Your forehead is so big that your name is Humpty Dumpty, the big forehead!
Yo mama's teeth so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter!
Your hairline is more bent than James Charles' gender.
Memes
You're so bald, Bob Hope would refer to you as "grandpa."
Your forehead is damn big, Walt was jealous of you.
Your mama so fat, Jupiter is smaller than her.
You are so fat that Big Chungus looks like a small Chungus.
When you want to see and smell your ex for the last time, look at a ugly dog, and smell the garbage.
Q: I often think I'm ugly, but then I think of my sister and get over it.
What is the difference between you and my dad?
Nothing.
What's the difference between anal and oral sex?
An and Or!
The egg that beat Kylie Jenner.
Q. What's the difference between Trump and a Teletubby?
A. The Teletubby is a lot more coherent.
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has claws at the end of paws; a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
What’s the difference between a penis and a golf ball?
A penis always goes in the hole.
What’s the difference between erotic and kinky?
Erotic is usually a feather. Kinky is using the whole chicken.
Your hairline is like a lollipop because every time someone licks it, it gets shorter.
You're so skinny that a Wi-Fi signal is stronger.