Comparison jokes

How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.

Yo mama so far, she makes the Statue of Freedom look like a 6-inch action figure.

Your hairline is more bent than James Charles' gender.

Your forehead is damn big, Walt was jealous of you.

Your forehead is so big that your name is Humpty Dumpty, the big forehead!

You're so bald, Bob Hope would refer to you as "grandpa."

Yo mama's teeth so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter!

You're so tall that you are a measuring tape.

You make Sanic look like a PRINCESS when he's next to you.

I thank God that I'm not as ugly as you.

What's the difference between a woman and a freezer?

A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.

My friend that used to be married was making jokes about me being short. Then I told him, "Your marriage was so short it made me look like Shaquille O'Neal."

Q: I often think I'm ugly, but then I think of my sister and get over it.

You are so fat that Big Chungus looks like a small Chungus.

Your mama so fat, Jupiter is smaller than her.

When you want to see and smell your ex for the last time, look at a ugly dog, and smell the garbage.

What is the difference between you and my dad?

Nothing.

The egg that beat Kylie Jenner.

Your hairline is like Mr. Clean's... nonexistent!

Obese is the N-word for fat people.