Comparison

Comparison jokes

Memes

Woman

What's the difference between a woman and a freezer?

A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.

Marriage

My friend that used to be married was making jokes about me being short. Then I told him, "Your marriage was so short it made me look like Shaquille O'Neal."

Sister

Q: I often think I'm ugly, but then I think of my sister and get over it.

Ex

When you want to see and smell your ex for the last time, look at a ugly dog, and smell the garbage.

Sweater

I still remember the third of December, me in your sweater. You said it looked better on me than it did you. Only if you knew how much I liked you. But I watch your eyes as she walks by. What a sight for sore eyes, Brighter than the blue sky. She's got you mesmerized while I die. Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half as pretty. You gave her your sweater, it's just polyester, But you like her better. Wish I were Heather. Watch as she stands with her, holding your hand. Put your arm 'round her shoulder, now I'm getting colder. But how could I hate her, she's such an angel. But then again, kinda wish she were dead as she walks by. What a sight for sore eyes. Brighter than the blue sky. She's got you mesmerized while I die. Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half as pretty. You gave her your sweater, it's just polyester, But you like her better. I wish I were Heather. Oh, I wish I were Heather. Oh, oh, wish I were Heather. Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half as pretty. You gave her your sweater, it's just polyester, But you like her better. Wish I were-

Difference

What’s the difference between Juice WRLD and George Floyd?

Nothing, they both can’t breathe.

Penis

What’s the difference between a penis and a golf ball?

A penis always goes in the hole.

Comma

What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?

A cat has claws at the end of paws; a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.