Common jokes
What do Ligma and Bofa have in common?
They both ride on my dick.
Q. What do filicide jokes and filicide victims have in common?
A. They never get old.
What do a blonde chick and a field of wheat have in common?
They're both bound to get plowed at some point in time.
What do a blonde chick and a turtle both have in common?
When they're on their backs, they're screwed.
What does the plane that hit the Twin Towers and milk have in common?
My dad went to get both and never came back.
What are three things the Twin Towers have in common with my dad? They are big, sexy, and smashed your mom.
What do a 100-year-old pornstar and The White Stripes have in common? Icky Thump!
What do cake and baseball have in common?
Both need batters.
What do phones and orphans have in common?
They selfie! (It's because they don't have parents.)
What do Philippe Petit and New York citizens have in common?
They both walk(ed) over the Twin Towers.
What do orphans and apples not have in common? Apples get picked.
What does a kite and a criminal have in common?
They both get high.
What do Marie Antoinette and 2005-2012 Korn have in common?
They're both Headless.
What does the Catholic Church and Worstjokesever.com have in common?
They're both full of child groomers.
What do visiting Goatman's Bridge and a bungee jumping accident have in common?
You hear a snap, and suddenly you're falling from a bridge.
What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?
Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”
What does Kurt have in common with painters?
They paint walls.
What do Jim Kelly and Dick Cheney have in common?
They both make terrible hunters.
What do autistic retards and birds have in common?
They both flap their arms, lol.
What do orphans and sperm donor kids have in common? They don't have dads.