Common jokes
What does a pencil and a plan have in common?
They were both in the Twin Towers.
What do cake and baseball have in common?
Both need batters.
What does a kite and a criminal have in common?
They both get high.
What do Marie Antoinette and 2005-2012 Korn have in common?
They're both Headless.
What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?
Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”
What does a pregnant slave and a "pay less" sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
What do Call of Duty and Al-Qaeda goals have in common?
You’ve got to get more than one down.
What does broccoli and sex have in common?
If you were forced to have it as a kid, you’re gonna hate it as an adult.
What does a paleontologist and woke people have in common?
They both enjoy digging up the past.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
What do Jim Kelly and Dick Cheney have in common?
They both make terrible hunters.
What do birds and children have in common?
If you shoot them, they die.
What do orphans and sperm donor kids have in common? They don't have dads.
What do Princess Diana and the Beatles have in common?
They both made quite an impact in Europe.
What’s bin Laden got in common with SpongeBob?
Both can be found at the bottom of the sea, and they’re filled with holes.
What do you and orphans have in common?
Nobody loves you.
What does an orphan and a lost kid have in common?
They have no way home.
What do Christmas decorations and dead people have in common?
They both hang from a tree!
What do depressed teenagers and fruits have in common?
They both hang by something.
What does a sex offender that is a lesbian have in common with a sex offender that is a feminist?
They only performed cunnilingus on girls under 18 years old.