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What does an Foreign say, when he comes to America?
I don't know, i dont speak foreignish...
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bippidy boppidy boo Bill Cosby is coming for you
Why did Shawn suddenly fly to Mount Everest, leaving behind friends family and food?
Someone told him that Shelby coming round the mountain.
Why did Hitler get hit by a baseball?
Because he did nazi it coming!
What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?
With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.
"Hi Mrs. Jackson, can Matt come out and play?" " Oh, Johnny you know Matt doesn't have any arms or legs." "I know, we just wanted to use him as third base."
There once was a man from Peru.who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke up at night ,with a terrible fright,to find out his dream had come true.
What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a pimple... you never see a pimple come on a little boys face.
Papyrus= well come to the underground. sans= how was your falls. Papyrus= g-g-good luck eve-ever ge-getting o-out. Sans= give me your balls!
How does an American know that his time has come? He starts hearing Vietnamese.
One dark stormy night when i was 8 years old I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee, half asleep i walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. When I opened the door i felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically and the ghostly sound stopped, terrified I did what I had to and went back to bed. The next 3 nights the same thing happened and finally i decided i had to tell my mom no matter how hard to believe it sounded. The next night I woke up I went into my parents room and woke my mom up and said, "you have to come with me and see this it's really important," Half asleep she murmured, "oh what is it can't it wait until the morning?' I pleaded, "no you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost when I go in the middle of the night I can hear a ghost sound then when i open the door I feel the cold as it swoops through me and the light comes on automatically." She yawned and said, "oh so that's who's been peeing in the refrigerator."
Little Johnny went to school and right before class started, he pulled down his pants and said "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." After that, his teacher told him to put on his pants and go to the office. The principal asked him what he did, so he pulled down his pants and said "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." Then the principal called his mom. The mom got there and took little Johnny home. They got in the car, and his mother asked "Johnny, what did you do this time? So johnny pulled his pants and said "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." Once they got home his dad was off work and heard that johnny was coming home early from school, once again he asked johnny what he did. Johnny pulled down his pants and said "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." After that, his dad was surprised so his dad pulled down his pants and said "Big whale, big whale."
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Old woman: You are such a darling child. Please come and see me again next year.
A year later, as child walks up to the door of the old ladies house...
Oh my! Goodness sakes child! Have you grown, or have I shrank???
Child: Both
What does Marcus Rashford say when he comes to the stadium? I wanna kick some balls!
They say making and having friends comes with some benefits, I guess You could say I have friends with benefits
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas, I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
What is the difference between a woman and a ice? The ice always comes back
