Children jokes
What do you call an orphanage that's not an orphanage?
A homeless shelter.
Why do mostly younger orphans get adopted?
Because who wants a traffic an adult?
Why can't orphans see all these jokes on this website that we're posting?
'Cause they don't know where the home page is.
When I die, I want to be shot out of a cannon.
And into a children's birthday party.
What’s an orphan's favorite food?
: Not home food.
Me: Hey, I’m your mom.
Orphan: Yay, you came back!
Me: Sike!
One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully off him. The cop then asked the bully, "Why are you beating him up?" I responded, saying, "I'm fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease." Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, "Well, how did I do?"
How many children does Explain Bear have?
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedophile have in common?
"Are you ready kids?"
I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.
Why is it wrong to drive around in a van offering children candy?
Because you’ll have more success if you give out video games!
Bill Clinton and Joe Biden are on a sinking ship.
Joe Biden says we need to save the women and children. Bill Clinton says, "Screw the women and children." Joe Biden says, "Do we have that much time?"
One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Claus,
"Please send me a sibling!"
Santa Claus wrote him back and said, "Okay, send me your mother!"
How do terrorists feed their children?
"Here comes the airplane!"
What do you call a priest meeting his illegal children?
A holy CUMmunion.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
I was asked to design a website for an orphanage, so I decided to design it without the home page.
My husband and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
Why does the Please Touch Museum sound like "police touch museum?"
Because they gotta watch out for the pedos.
I put this joke so the amount of jokes will be 69. Also, I have 50 kids in my basement. I fed "Twinkies" last night.