Children jokes

What movie do orphans hate? Full House 🏠

Orphans are like vegans, no one ever remembers the nice ones.

I asked the orphan if he wanted to watch all the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies with me, and he started crying.

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.

What do you call a toy that has a story?

Toy Story.

My son came up to me and said, "Mom, where are your parents?"

I stared in confusion. I said, "In a far place."

He asked, "In an orphanage?"

Why did the orphan go to the playground?

To see if it could find its parents.

Punch an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?

Depends on how hard you throw them.

I still don't know what's the worst, most dangerous place to take your children on holiday, but, for certain, it's either Vatican City or Neverland Ranch.

What flour do orphans use?

Self-raising flour.

"Hey, don’t take my toy! What are you going to tell your parents?"

By the way, infertility is hereditary:

If your parents did not have children, you will not have any.

You could think that some orphans are gay.

But think, would they be home-osexual? 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️

Why do orphans hate family-size candy?

Because they can't share it with their family.

Why do orphans have gross cakes?

Because their dad didn't come home with the milk.

When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.

Mommy, when will daddy come back?

I'm not your mom...

I told an orphan to never stop talking until their parents come home.

Now I can’t get it to shut up.

My wife and I just decided we don't want to have children.

So if anyone wants them, our contact information is below.