Children jokes

9 year olds can consent. That’s like 18 divided by 2.

I walked into an orphanage and a kid was crying. I asked him what was wrong and he said some kids were bullying him. I told him to go tell his parents.

Why can't orphans really play baseball?

Because when they do, all the other kids tell that joke that everyone has heard more than 50 times.

Heyo, my children, hope you haven't forgotten about our cult!

KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."

I told an orphan to never stop talking until their parents come home.

Now I can’t get it to shut up.

My wife and I just decided we don't want to have children.

So if anyone wants them, our contact information is below.

Mommy, when will daddy come back?

I'm not your mom...

What do you call it when an orphan takes a selfie?

A family portrait.

A game that all orphans hate,

"Who's your Daddy?"

How are Fortnite cards and orphans similar? They're given away.

Q: Why can't orphans ever win at Yahtzee?

A: Because they can never seem to get a full house.

What's big, bounces, and makes little kids cry?

My donation to the orphanage :)

What are two plus sides to being an orphan?

1. All your snacks are family sized.

2. No one can make jokes about your mama.

I asked the orphan if he wanted to watch all the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies with me, and he started crying.

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?

Depends on how hard you throw them.

What flour do orphans use?

Self-raising flour.

What do you call a toy that has a story?

Toy Story.

I'm sorry, orphans, that you're getting bullied. Oh, I have to go, my MOM's calling me. We're going on a road trip to go to a FAMILY reunion!