Children

Children jokes

What's the difference between onions and children? Nothing, when you cut one everyone around you cries.

So Little Johnny saw a robbery, so he tried to stop the robber. To the robber's surprise, he was amazed. So Johnny got 20 shots to the head. The End.

Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?

A Catholic school is burning down. One of the priests says, "Save the children, save them!" Another priest says, "F*ck the children, we're gonna die!!" The last priest is like, "Hmmm... do we have time?"

How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?

You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving. IDK.

Why can't orphans go to sleepovers?

Their parents never say yes.

Why do boys feel safer at Ronald McDonald's House than Neverland Ranch?

Ronald McDonald's doesn't put his meat between boys' buns.

My wife and I just decided we don't want to have children.

So if anyone wants them, our contact information is below.

Why can’t orphans watch Netflix?

Because they don't know what age rate they are...

What is the difference between a preschool and my basement?

Little kids leave preschool.

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  • What do pedophiles and Xboxes have in common?

    They both get turned on by kids.

    How do Chinese people get their names? Their parents throw woks down the stairs and name their children after the sound it makes.

    What’s the difference between a priest and target?

    Nothing, they both have children’s pants half off.