How do adults like their cookies like their orphans?
Homemade.
Why are orphans not boomerangs? Because they never come back.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They don't have a home plate.
Name one person who would take an orphan?
Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.
Michael Jackson gets really ill, so he's rushed to hospital. When they get there, he says, "Am I in heaven?"
The doctor replies, "Nah, sir, we're just taking a quick shortcut through the children's ward."
What do you call a white kid at the back of class?
A school shooter.
What's big, black, and touches children?
Harambe.
What do you get when you have a class of kids and a speeding car?
A 24 killstreak!
Little Johnny ran into the kitchen and asked his mother, "Mom, can little girls have babies?" His mom answered, "Of course not." A few minutes later, his mom heard him shout to his friend, "It's okay, we can keep playing!"
What has ten children crying, naked, and screaming for their parents?
My big green pedo machine.