If you die a virgin, then where does your v-card go? Does it go with you to the grave, or does your mortician take it from you?
Card Jokes
Q: Why can't the orphan buy Robux?
A: He could not use his mother's credit card.
One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.
A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.
Why can’t orphans play poker? Because they don’t know what a full house is.
How come lepers don't play cards?
Well, if they lose a couple of hands...
I heard that the numbers on the front of your credit card represent the number of minutes until you meet the 💕 love of your life!💕
And the 3 numbers on the back represent the month and day you make it official!!
Comment those numbers to lock it in!!😄
Why can orphans not play bingo?
Because they can't get a full house.
If you mixed the Iraq wheat scandal with the basics card paying other people's dole to your wife and tumble dried it in a royal commission that made your priestly mates look bad, what would you get?
Tony Abbott's career.
I played Uno with my Mexican friend.
That bastard took all the green cards!
What is a photographer's favorite card game?
SNAP!
Yo, if Russia comes to the USA, just know their reboot cards don't expire.
I bought this happy birthday card for this orphan.
To: The Orphan
From: ______
Your hairline was playing Sorry!
Pulled the wrong card and moved back five spaces.
"Abracadabra! Alacuzam! See that woman? She’s now a man."
"After the man got some sun, I turned this banana into a gun! Now look! I now have your phone, Apple Watch, and your credit card!"
Q: What are cheetahs?
A: The worst card players!
Why shouldn’t you play cards in Africa?
'Cause there’s too many cheetahs.
My favorite bartender serves drinks so strong, he gives a "get well soon" card with each one of them!
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
What card is the slowest and slimiest?
Ace-nail.
Okay, 19 dollar Fortnite card. Who wants it?
And yes, I’m giving it away. Remember: Share, share, share! And trolls: Don’t get BLOCKED!
