i was driving a car and a fat person was crossing the street, when I swerved my car to miss her, I ran out of gas.
Luckily his funeral was a closed casket, sorry his car blew a gasket
When they say you live by the sword, you die by the sword, not in Paul Walker's case. He lived by the car, died by a tree. Well, I guess the car was stumped.
Why was Elon Musk unable to land a job as a television host at NBC?
His own car cannot catch up with Jay Leno's Corvette!
A man is driving down the road and runs over a rabbit. He slams on his brakes, gets out, and walks up to the flattened bunny. The bunny is obviously expired.
A passing car slams on its brakes and screeches to a halt. The driver of that car runs up to the bunny, pulls out an aerosol can, and sprays the bunny with the aerosol spray. The bunny jumps up, runs a few feet, then stops, turns around, and waves its paw at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. He continues to do this until he’s out of sight.
The first driver looks at the man with the aerosol can and says, “Wow, that is amazing! What is in that can?” The man looks at the can and reads the label, “Hair restorer, with a permanent wave.”
What's the difference between Paul Walker's car and a petite white girl?
There is no difference.
They both got split open by a huge log.
If Hitler was in a car doing his salute, he would be saying, "Take the third right."
A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."
Why do sisters have to be in a relationship? Because you don’t have to worry about your car.
Today I found out that my cat got hit by a car accident. Well, I guess I'm gonna play ninja fruits on my hands again. It's not like anyone will notice.
I got so drunk with the guys yesterday that when the Uber driver asked how many drinks I had, I said, "Yes."
What’s big and black the road
whats Stephen Hawking favourite type of car on fire? Hot wheels
Why was the computer late for work
He had a hard drive
What was hitlers facorite part of the car? The gas tank
What weighs 70 pounds and doesn't like sex?
The 6 year old in the trunk of my car.
Your hairline and my car goes lighting McQueen speed because he never came back with the milk
My mom bought me a car and she called me an ungrateful b**ch because I sat in my wheelchair the whole time
I asked my dad, "are we there yet" and he told me "don't worry son it will be a short ride"
I can't tell whats farther the great wall of China or how far Paul Walker flew out his windshield
