Cant jokes
Q: Why can't dinosaurs clap?
A: Because they're dead.
What has two legs but can’t walk? Pants 👖
What do kids play when they can't play with a phone?
Bored games.
Why can’t trans men enjoy chocolate?
It uses Hershey pronouns.
Why can't America play chess?
They're missing two towers.
Good Evening Twitter, this is your boy EatDatPussy445, and about like 30-45 minutes ago, I beat the f*** out of my dick so god damn hard that I can't even feel my left leg, my left leg has went totally numb. And, my dick has also went totally numb, to the point where it feels f***ing weird when I go and take a piss.
There was a blind man in WWE, and the commentator said, "Watch out! Watch... Oh, he can’t see." After he was sued for national offense.
Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms?
Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.
Why can't Cleopatra ride a bicycle?
Because she's dead.
1.) What’s yellow and can’t swim?
- A bus full of children.
2.) Did you hear about the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
- He died of a yeast infection.
3.) I will never forget my grandad’s last words...
- “You’re still holding the ladder, right?”
4.) I have a fish that can breakdance...
- Only for 20 seconds though, and only once.
5.) Give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours...
- Light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
Q: Why can't the orphan buy Robux?
A: He could not use his mother's credit card.
What does Nemo have in common with my dad?
They both can't be found.
Technoblade can defeat every Minecraft player, but he still can’t defeat cancer!
Why can't toilet paper cross the road? Because the toilet paper got stuck in a crack. 🤣🤣🤣
Since Christopher Reeves can't play Superman, they got a new person: Christopher Walken.
Why do orphans always get picked on?
They can't run and tell their parents.
What does a tuna, piano, and a tub of glue have in common?
You can tune a piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
But what about the glue? said Bob I. I knew you would get stuck on that!
I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off!
People are pushing for a Black Statue Of Liberty coin.
Can't wait to use Black people as currency again :)
Y'all, I'm suspended till Wednesday and can't do much cuz I'm on a tablet, not my computer. Tell autterpop I won't be on till Wednesday or after.