Cant jokes

What type of deer can jump higher than a house?

All houses can't jump.

I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.

Why can't Kobe go shopping?

He's dead.

You can't spell "Funeral" without "fun."

Why can't orphans be gay?

'Cause they can't call anyone "Daddy."

What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?

Nothing, because fish can't talk.

What kind of videos can't orphans watch?

Family-friendly content.

Can you go as a horse for Halloween?

Well, if you do, I can't wait to ride you!

Why does Joe only have 264 days in his calendar?

Because he can't celebrate Father's Day.

Riddle: I can fill a room, others can have me, but I can't be shared. What am I?

Answer: Loneliness.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

They don't know where home is! 🤣

Why can't you eat cereal?

Because your dad never came back from getting the milk!

Why can't British people play chess?

Because they lost their queen.

Can we have sex, because if we don't, I can't like you, big, thick booty!

So let's have sex in bed, you sexy woman, or behind a tree, because shoving my dick in your pussy is a very nice feeling while sucking your ass.

So this dude comes home from work one day, and his wife is watching the Food Network.

The husband asks, "Why do you watch that? You still can't cook," and the wife responds, "Why do you watch porn? You still can't f*ck."

So you know there's like dog mixes, right? Like a Snoodle and that stuff, right? So why can't a bulldog and a shih tzu be mixed? 'Cause if they did, it would be called bullshit.

What can't play home in baseball? They don't have one.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find home.

It hasn't been the same since Kobe died. I can't say "Kobe" anymore when going to shoot a shot. Now I have to say, "Kobe crash!"

Why can't orphans open a family business?

Because there is no family.