Cant jokes

What does Nemo have in common with my dad?

They both can't be found.

What is one word orphans can't spell?

Family.

What's yellow and can't swim? My mom on Halloween.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They never hit home.

Asian Grading scale: A- Average.

B- Half Average.

C- Stupid idiot!

D- FAILURE! CAN'T EVEN DO CALCULUS!

F- FORGOTTEN FAILURE! CAN'T EVEN GET A JOB AT MCDONALDS!

Why does Joe only have 264 days in his calendar?

Because he can't celebrate Father's Day.

Why can't orphans be gay?

'Cause they can't call anyone "Daddy."

What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?

Nothing, because fish can't talk.

What kind of videos can't orphans watch?

Family-friendly content.

Why can't Kobe go shopping?

He's dead.

I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.

What type of deer can jump higher than a house?

All houses can't jump.

Why can't an orphan play football? Because they don't have a dad or mom.

How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb? None, they can't change anything.

I am just kidding, you know gay jokes aren't funny, come on guys.

You can't spell "Funeral" without "fun."

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

They don't know where home is! 🤣

Riddle: I can fill a room, others can have me, but I can't be shared. What am I?

Answer: Loneliness.

Why can't you eat cereal?

Because your dad never came back from getting the milk!

How many women does it take to change a light bulb?

None, they can't change anything.

So this dude comes home from work one day, and his wife is watching the Food Network.

The husband asks, "Why do you watch that? You still can't cook," and the wife responds, "Why do you watch porn? You still can't f*ck."