People are pushing for a new black lady liberty coin. I can't wait to use black people as currency again
Customer: Can I get this in a smaller size and a different color?
Employee: Ma’am, this is an adoption agency, you can’t do that here!
Chuck Norris can drift with a horse.
How does a prostitute make more than a drug dealer?
Because she can clean her crack and sell it again.
The Pentagon is changing the nuclear codes to over 140 characters, ...
so Trump can't tweet it.
Why can’t you ever trick an aborted baby?
Because it wasn’t born yesterday 🤭
To all you who can't understand using jokes as coping mechanism... you know what i will ask of you:)
Why is it that when Donald Trump and Melania make love she is always on top?
Donald Trump can only F@#k up.
I've just started reading my first ever Braille horror story and I think that something scary is about to happen. I can feel it.
What do you call a knight in a cannibal village? -- Canned food.
What's the difference between a phone and a girl? You can turn it off whenever you want.
What does an Al Qaida terrorist and a flexible man have in common? They can blow themselves
i used keep asking a woman if i can rape her until she got so annoyed and said "stop asking me"
One day, the teacher asks a boy, "Why can't fish talk underwater?" The kid says, "If I put your head underwater, will you be able to talk?"
My girlfriends last words I can’t wait to become a mom
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.
A husband comes home from work one day and his wife is watching the Food Network. The husband asks, "Why do you watch that? You still can’t cook," and the wife responds, "Why do you watch porn? You still can’t fuck."
Why is the bottom of the sea so dark?
Because Black people can’t swim
rizz
are you a biographer cause i picture us toghether can i take a picture of you for i can show santa what i want for christmas No pen No paper you still draw my attention you know what i hate about math they always talk about x and y but not about u and i
My ex boyfriend tried to scan himself at the supermarket check out for fun.
“See how I can’t scan myself? It’s because I’m priceless”
I decided I’d scan my wrist too, just for fun.
Found out I’m worth $3.97
