Hey Ryan, what do you call a wall so large no man can conquer. Answer: Ryans forehead
So one day in 3rd grade, i was making this art piece and i was talking about my friend that was a boy that i have known for 5 years. but then, the other boy at my table named Coen Jones shouted, "NO! I"M THE ONLY BOYFRIEND YOU CAN HAVE!!!!" as soon as i heard all that, the teacher and the rest of our class was shocked while our table was just laughing there butts off, but laughed so hard, i fell out of my chair!
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke and it asked me “what is the difference between a large pizza and you”one can feed a family
Why don’t I shut myself all the time. I can only fit so many pares of kid in my mouth and stomach at the same time.
My homework was to watch as much porn as I can... and tell my teacher the details so he won't get in trouble for watching it during class.
Why can’t you sell nans but you can sell zebras ?
i told some orphan that you can see your family but I meant spider man home coming...
i'm bored so can yall ask me some questions and i have to answer them
When you don't wear earrings for a long time the hole can close and it hurts so much when you want to put it back 🙄🙄 😁😁😁🤣
I can get my grandma 50% off from her groceries by just scanning my wrist.
pro tip kids, you CAN hit an orphan because they cant cry to their parents
Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner. His mother says, “I don’t like your friends”. Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”
What is a four leg animal called that can fly
A donkey flying in the sky running away from me
I call this my great talk with Siri
Me : hey Siri give me and Ur Mom joke
Siri: My mother ? Huh?
Me: Did I stutter?
Siri: Interesting question
Me : it wasn’t a question
Siri: I’m not sure I understand?
Me: you should understand
Siri: hmm... Is there something else I can help with?
Me: no you b***
Quote of the day: Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day [Comment your favorite fall beverage]
The only thing they can see are there chopsticks
Which country can swim?
Finland. Get it? Fin Land?
Your Mom is so fat she can be trumps border wall
Your forehead is so big you can land a jumbo jet on it
A girl in my class started barking and I yelled out "Furry!" Everyone started laughing at her and I felt bad after school I asked to drive her home and one the way there I apologized and then told her to count down from 10 - 1. Before she said one I yelled " THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" then I jumped out the car
