Buy jokes

Why can orphans not grow big and strong? Because they need a parent to buy them steroids.

A kid came from school. His mother said, "What did you do in school?" The boy replied, "I had sex with my teacher." She said, "OH MY GOD, GO TO YOUR ROOM, WAIT UNTIL YOUR DAD COMES!" He waited, then his dad walked in and said, "Your mother told me what you did. I'm proud of you, son. Let's go buy you a bicycle." When they arrived to the store, the dad said, "Try out and see which seat is the comfortable." The boy said, "I can't, my butt is sore." Dad said, "Why is your butt sore?" The Boy said, "Because I had sex with my teacher."

Why can’t orphans buy ice cream?

They don’t have money.

How can you buy emos? Just use their bar code.

A depressed man buys a gun for suicide, but then thinks, "maybe I shouldn't be doing this," and asks a friend for help. He returns with a rope.

So I went to a mall and I was finna buy something... and I saw a little boy and he said "hello," so then I passed by him and he said "hi," and I was like "hi nigga," and he said, "um, just wondering something... I mean I like jokes, but what is dark humor?" And I was like "umm🤔.. it's like 🤔🤔...like you see that guy without legs? Tell him to stand up"... and he said "I'm blind nigga" and I said "exactly homie"... aight nigga peace and look out😏😉

What stands on the side of the road and needs a lot of money to buy?

Billboard, did you think I was gonna say street walker?

Do you want to buy my Hoover?

I mean... it's just collecting dust.

Why don’t orphans have phones?? Because their parents can’t buy them one.

Do you want drugs? Buy KFC; poor people.

Why can't you buy an iPhone X?

It's too expensive.

What present can a pimp always buy his hoes to both show how much he thinks of them and know they can never get enough of?

Condoms!

Where do you buy cows in bulk?

At the stock market.

Q: Why can't the orphan buy Robux?

A: He could not use his mother's credit card.

A girl walks up to her dad to ask for a dress for prom and he says, "Suck my dick and I'll buy you a dress." She does it and says to him, "Dad, your dick tastes like shit." And he says, "Yeah, your brother wanted a car."

My dick wants to buy you a beer. 🍺

I go to the shop and buy 2 pints of kimo.

My first time sex was like buying my first used, crappy car.

I didn't want it, but Dad gave it to me anyway.

What do crows get after they buy a phone?

A cawing card.

When you're so rich that you can buy anything, you end up getting a cow in your living room. Yeah, anyways, my ex is still in my living room.