Buy jokes

People shouldn't worry about how orphans would feel reading these jokes. It's not like they have parents to buy them a phone or computer to see them, or even a place to charge them even if they did have one.

What flavor do you buy an orphan?

Self raising.

Where does Captain Hook buy his hook?

At a second-hand store.

There were two friends talking one day. Tim tells John, "I think I'm gay."

John says to Tim, "What do you mean?"

Tim says, "When I grow up, I want to dress like a woman and sing karaoke in a bar and call myself (Gillette the best a man can get)!"

John says to Tim, "I think you're right, and thanks for reminding me I need to buy razors."

"Buy a man an airplane ticket, he will fly once. Throw a man off an airplane and he will fly for the rest of his life."

- Sun Tzu

My wife is so fat. She buys her clothes at Tent & Awning!

Why can't homeless people buy a house?

'Cause they live on the streets.

I'm so poor that they let me buy the entire store! For $0...

What flour do you buy an orphan?

Self-raising flour.

🇻🇪 Finally, I am a trillionaire. Now I can buy bread.

What stands on the side of the road and needs a lot of money to buy?

Billboard, did you think I was gonna say street walker?

"Dick, you're fired."

"I'd buy that for a dollar."

My Grandma, like any other, got an APPLE IPHONE 12, but as we all know, we get dumb, and so we buy a phone. My grandma did not even know how to use it. She even said, "How do I go on Google?" I told her, "YOU CAN'T!" My grandma was, like, "Yeah right, how do I do it?"

Comment down below, does your grandma do this?

My brother goes into the bar and says, "Bartender, give me 12 beers and a shot of whiskey." The bartender says, "That's a lot of alcohol." My brother says, "I'm celebrating my first blowjob." The bartender said, "Let me buy you a drink." My brother said, "No, this should be enough to get the taste out of my mouth."

In the realm of pixels and screens, Josh pursues videos, a world unseen. Six dollars exchange, a transaction made, A story told, emotions cascade.

The power of film, a gift divine, Stirring souls, weaving through time. Six dollars spent, a connection formed, A simple act, a heart transformed.

In every frame, a universe unfolds, Captivating minds, stories untold. Josh buys videos for six, a token small, Yet within them lies magic, captivating all.

Hi there guys, I have no jokes, buy.

Where do leg amputees go to buy a car?

IHOP

*walks into sex shop*

Hello. I would like to buy 1 sex, please.

So I saw a 15 year old kid near a 15 year old girl checking her out.

Then I told him, "What are you doing?"

He told me he will decorate her locker, donate a lot of money to her, and buy her a lot of stuff.

He then told me how easy would that be?

I told him: "That sounds pretty SIMPle."

A drunk walks into a bar and sees a beautiful woman at the other end of the bar and says, "Bartender, I want to buy that douchebag a drink."

The bartender says, "You can't talk like that! This is a respectable establishment, I'm going to throw you out!"

The drunk says, "Okay, I'm sorry. I'd like to buy the lady a drink."

The bartender goes to where the woman is sitting and says, "The, ah, gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you a drink, what will it be?"

She says, "Vinegar and water."