But jokes

Two persons were in a car. The brakes were broken and they were going so fast that they would crash and die.

The driver said: "Oh no! We will die!" but the person sitting next to him replied: "Don't panic, the stop sign at the end of the road will stop us."

In Mario, it is called a Zoomba, but if it was real, it would be a boomba.

My diet consists of Blood Pudding, I love it and have it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, my secret ingredient though?

It consists of the blood and insides of my victims, it’s a bit chunky sometimes, some bits chewy, some bits hard, but it’s a hearty meal.

Jesus told me if I believed I would live for eternity. I believed, but at 97 I died...

I think Jesus is broken.

I was wearing a mask and told the teacher I ate her vagina. She said what? I pulled my mask down and said, "No, I said I like your hyenas." Then a kid sees me do it, but he only heard the first part, so he goes up to the teach and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight." She said, "Pull your mask down," and he pulls his mask down and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight."

We wrote letters to a kid with cancer.

My letter read, "It's a bumpy road, but soon you will have a straight path."

People didn't realize it was meant for his heart monitor.

When you see your friend, you call the police, but they just moan.

We all know the joke: Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 9.

But do you know why 9 is scared of 7?

Because you are supposed to eat 3 square meals a day (3 squared).

I have 25 friends in the alphabet.

But I don't know why.

Well, it really do be like it shouldn't, but it is.

Boss: Can I do a reference check?

Me: I don’t have a...

*sensei appears*

Me: oh no

Sensei: He was a good student, but he lacked kizma.

Boss: What's kiz...

Sensei:😈

Me: Oh no, here we go.

Sensei: Kizma AS-

Say "Uranus" but take out the "ur."

Peyk 47 said that Kobe Bryant is not a legend, but he is.

Why were the Twin Towers mad? They ordered pepperoni, but they got plain.

Your Roblox friend counts to 10, but she doesn't count to "too." Then Roblox says: "Damn. Your Roblox friend can't count."

Your mama is so far that when she told a joke, no one was laughing, but the floor was literally cracking up.

Ben 10 and a disabled person are the same, but no aliens for the disabled person.

My friend's dad died during 9/11. He was such a good pilot, but my friend kept disturbing him, so when his dad died, he said, "It was you who killed me" (to the child).

So the child said, "Yoo-hoo? What type of name is Yoo-hoo, but Yoo-hoo, Yoo-hoo come here, I need to kill you NOW."

I was going to tell a joke about a mirror, but it seems that I'm looking at one.

Why did the terrorist not get paid, but they loved their job?

They di2s drying plans.