McDonald's was originally called "Mac and Dick," so, if you think about it, you could be enjoying a Big Dick instead of a Big Mac.
How to decorate a wall:
Strip off the paper and original plaster.
Put on fresh plaster and wallpaper.
Paint it (if you want).
Send a bill to North America and wait patiently for a reply.
I went to the local butcher's and asked him what happened to his Saturday boy. The butcher replies, "I had to fire him, I found him with his dick in the meat slicer!"
"What did you do with the meat slicer?" I asked.
The butcher says, "I had to fire her too!"
Alternative punchline:
"I had to call social services, she was only 14."
Where do Dairy Queen and Burger King go after dinner?
White Castle.
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender said, "Why the long face?"
You went to the bed store asking for a water bed. They put a pillow and sheets on the ocean.
Why did KFC take orphan?
Because kids fattening center.
Why is there no toilet paper at KFC?
Because it's finger lickin' good!
I heard that the World Orphan Organization has a sponsor... DC Comics.
What's the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute?
A prostitute can wash its crack and sell it again.
Apple tried to make a car, but it had no windows ;)
The Twin Towers ordered Little Caesars, but instead got Dominos.
Where do you buy cows in bulk?
At the stock market.
Once you’ve seen a shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.
A missionary went to visit an orphanage in Thailand. After looking around, he asked the manager, "Why do these kids have numbers instead of names on their shirts? And why are some of them the same?"
The manager smiled and said, "Those are price tags."
Did you hear about the new Oasis restaurant?
Every time you order soup, you got a roll with it.
Why do laws forbid hoes from owning stocks in condom makers?
Answer: Insider trading.
Hi! Sorry I haven't posted in a while. I've been so busy!!!! I miss y'all, though!
What do you call it when Panera Bread gets painted red?
Panera Red.
Elderly man: Can I get a discount, please? I fought in World War 2.
Cashier: Sure!
Elderly man: Danke.
