Bus jokes
So, I was going out the door and I see my dwarf neighbor at the bus stop. I ask if he needs a lift. He replies with "fu.. off." So, I zip up my backpack and keep going to work.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.
Why did Joe get hit by a bus? Sally was driving it.
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
What a day yesterday was! I got a promotion, and my sister's killer was hit by a bus. Now I'm in a cast!
So little Johnny was on the bus, and the bus driver already hated him. So he started to talk to himself JUST loud enough for the bus driver to hear.
"If my dad was a bull, and my mom was a cow, that would make me... a little bull!"
"If my dad was a rooster, and my mom was a hen, that would make me... a little rooster!"
And by this point, the bus driver was fed up with him, so he said:
"Ok little Johnny, I got one for you: If your dad was a drunk, and your mom was a whore, what would that make you?"
Little Johnny smiled and said: "A bus driver!"
What do you call a school bus that you cannot drive?
A friend.
What do you call a flying bus?
An Airbus.
Yo mama is so fat when she sees a bus full of white people, she thinks it's a Twinkie, lmao xd.
Can’t believe how ungrateful my dwarf next-door neighbor is. I saw him waiting at the bus stop earlier today and offered to give him a lift, but he told me to “fuck off.” In the end, I decided to just close my rucksack and walk away.
1.) What’s yellow and can’t swim?
- A bus full of children.
2.) Did you hear about the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
- He died of a yeast infection.
3.) I will never forget my grandad’s last words...
- “You’re still holding the ladder, right?”
4.) I have a fish that can breakdance...
- Only for 20 seconds though, and only once.
5.) Give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours...
- Light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, put on your helmet 'cause you're about to miss the short bus.
What did the bus say to the mail?
Dog.
Person: Did you hear about the black chick on the front of the bus?
Friend: No?
Person: Exactly.
Bus went vrrrrrrrm.
Why did the frog take the bus to work?
His car got toad.
Why did the basketball player not get on the bus?
Because he couldn’t be caught travelling! 😂
Do you know a funny bus driver? I do.
Your mama is so fat and stupid. She got hit by a school bus. Her reply was, "Who threw that Twinkie at me?"
Why was the rapper always late?
Because he had to drop his kids off at the Rhyme Bus.
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A school bus full of children.
Why couldn’t Billy go to school today?
The bus driver hit Sally.