Brother

Brother jokes

So uh, I did this thing where I put soap on my brother's toothbrush, and then I put more on and colored it to make it look like toothpaste, and uh, he is constipated now. I AM EVIL :3

Mom, Mom, I'm holding my little brother's hand.

Little Johnny, good! But he's not "bien" yet.

Dear Gwen, you are not a faker, nor liar, nor loser!

And the people that are bothering you are just dumb, stupid, bored, and need to get a fricking life instead! Don't hurt yourself because of these comments, to be honest, you're really nice, kind, and mannered! There are more kind people than mean people, and I am one of them! Just live your life and ignore Liv and the unknown guy, which is named Greg! No need for all this drama!

Best, Tenya Bailey.

Hi, this is a good prank I did.

So, my brother LOVES his phone and so... I put it in the toilet and then flushed it, but it wouldn't go down. So, then I gave it to him and he threw it and then it broke. HAHAHAHAHAHA

(Prankster, tell me if you don't like me doing pranks because it is your thing.)

Bye guys! I hope you liked this prank! (And his phone did not really break, it just cracked really bad lol)

Mom: Anna, let your younger brother have the sled one half of the time, and you the other half. That way it will all be fair, and I don't have to put up with this crying. I've already got seven others to take care of.

Anna: I do, Mom. I have Fred (younger brother) go up, and I go down!

Mom: Good. Now how 'bout the rest of you go play outside? It's beautiful out there! It's the warmest it's been all year, 45 degrees below 0!

Kids: Wow! I never thought it would warm up! I love Alaska!

Alex: Dad, can we get me a little brother from the orphanage?

Dad: Sure, Alex! We're here!

Orphanage manager: Alex! You are so big now!

Alex: Dad, what is she talking about?!

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    • My brother wanted to go fishing. I told him he had to learn how to "master bait". Go look it up on YouTube. Guess who is grounded?

    3 year old boy: 1... 2...uh....?

    Older brother: Ooh I know! 1, 2, 3 get the fuck off my apple tree!

    Jack and Jill went down to hell to fetch your mother's bladder.

    Her bladder broke. You two are soaked, and now you have a daughter, 'cause in that bladder was me!

    Brother: Your nuts!

    Sister: What do you mean? You're the one that has the nuts!

    I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.

    I got the joke from my brother.

    So, I text my girlfriend and told her I wanted to get inside her. Can you believe she replied: "Not again brother, I'm only 8."

    My brother's addicted to buying ladders; he loves to get high.

    RICK: GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT OH GUESS WHAT MOTHERFUCKER OR IMMA SAY IT!!!!!!

    Richard: What????

    Rick: So before Donald Trump's impeachment, he said, "The Coronavirus will end on March 32nd 2021."

    Richard: Your from planet Earth where there's a March 32nd. Enjoy it, *stupid dumb fuck brother*.

    Rick: Oh I will.

    *It was the day March 21st*

    *9 Days later*

    *March 31st*

    Rick: oh I cant wait until tomorrow!!!!!!!!!! Ooh im so excited im gonna give my friends a big ole bro hug and hand shake i miss the muhfuckin dudes man

    *one day later*

    *He got his school uniform waiting for the bus not seeing it*

    Rick:....... wai......Huh!?!?...... hol....up

    BITCH IM AND IDIOT THERE IS NO MOTHERFUCKING MARCH 32ND THIS IS THE MOTHERFUCKING 1ST OF APRIL TRUMP DUMBASS

    *Richard*

    *oh he's the dumbass*

    BFF: Dude, come over to my house right now!

    Me: What? No way, it's 2:58 AM.

    BFF: But I just found my brother's secret stash of Oreos!

    Me: I'll be over in 5 minutes.