Bridge

Bridge jokes

Suicide

A hot girl wants to commit suicide and jump from a bridge when an ugly, smelly, homeless weirdo walks up to her. And he says, "Hey you hot babe, let's fuck." She just answers, "Get the fuck away you ugly bastard." The guy just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."

Family

I was happy for once, and my family was happy I was happy, but that all changed when they found out I was thinking about bridges and humans.

Common

What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common They both get laid by Mexicans

Fish

Two fish were swimming in a stream when it began to rain. "Quick, let's swim under that bridge, otherwise we will get wet!"

Memes

Suicide

I told a joke to a guy who had jumped off a bridge... He was in bits! 🤣🤦‍♂️

Suicide

what do you get when you cross parents, the san fran bridge and a moody asian teen?

Niagra falls

Burrito

What's the difference between a bridge and a burrito?

I can't jump off a burrito.

Man

Did you hear about the man who jumped off a bridge in France? He was in Seine.

Sex

How is sex like a game of bridge?

If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.

Leader

People ask me if my friend jumps off a bridge, will I go as well? Of course not. I am a leader; I will go first, my friend will jump after me!

Friend

My mom: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you?

Me: No.

Attack on Titan music starts playing in my head.

Woman

The other day I pushed a Chinese woman off the Golden Gate Bridge. I was Wong on so many levels.

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  • Class

    Teacher: Hi class, today we will learn about the song, "London Bridge is falling down, falling down."

    Then one student said, "I thought it was 'Twin Towers are falling down, falling down!'"

    Chick

    What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common?

    They’ll eventually get laid by a Mexican.

    Side

    Why was the Burnside Bridge so hot?

    Because it's on the burning side.