I got fired for not doing enough work.
Guess I didn’t put enough backbone into it.
A skeleton decided to become an assassin.
He was always skull-king around!
A dog found a bone. Then he was walking happily across the street, and he saw a bridge. He decided to walk on the bridge. He saw his reflection and thought it was another dog. Then he barked at him, and the bone fell in the river. The dog said, "What a fool I have been," and walked away.
Why did the skeleton cross the road?
To get to skull.
I once met a skeleton. I asked if I could tell him a joke. He agreed. I told it to him. He found it quite “humerus”.
Skeletons love to be in band. They love the trombone!
I've done a skele-TON of work to think of this joke. Trust me, I've got a FEW more jokes!
"Tibia" honestly, I think the reason I’m "bonely" is because you guys don’t find my jokes "humerus."
Maybe if I played the trombone it would get people’s attention, but "tibia" honest I can’t be bothered, so just look at my "BONE-zai" tree, although my brother doesn’t really like that one, so how about a "S-pine" tree?
Her Name was Lola. She was a loner. At the Copa I saw her And I just wanted to bone her!
Why did the skeleton die from laughter?
'Cause they broke all his "funny bones!"
Hey paps, BONE-appetit!
(Just eat your spaguetti.)
What did the funny bone say to the skin?
"You're not humerus, I am!"
Pigeons can be annoying at times, especially when their bones get stuck in-between your teeth.
"How would you describe a really bad skeleton?"
"Bad to the bone!" (Or "Rotten to the bone" if you want.)
What do you call a skeleton that does nothing all day?
A lazy bones!
What is a dog's favorite snack?
RUFFles.
Q: Two skeletons walk into a bar. What happens?
A: They fall.
(They walked into a BAR, as in a rod or whatnot.)
Dog toys are getting out of control.
My mum's dog has a round bison bone.
Looks like he was chewing on Tracy Latimer's hip or something.
My favorite instrument? The TromBONE, of course.
Why didn't the skeleton want to make art anymore?
He didn't have the heart to put into it.
