Body jokes
Yo mama so fat that when I banged her in the jacuzzi, there was a level 8 tsunami.
What do you call a person with no arms and legs?
You can call him whatever you want; he's not coming.
What kind of ankle are you? A broken ankle.
Riddle: A man killed his wife in his car with a knife, and no one could see him. He threw the body out of the car and threw the knife off a cliff. When he got home, the cops called the man and told him his wife was dead and to come to the scene of the crime. The man agreed and rushed to the scene. When he got there, the cops immediately arrested him. Why?
ANSWER: The cops never said where the scene of the crime is.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef!
I'mma flip this coin, if it lands on heads, tuh, you gotta give me head, if it lands on tails then you gotta give me the booty, so lets give this a try *flips coin* OOP! Would ya look at that, it landed on both, ESSKETIT!
My penis is on fire.
The dick said to the ass, "this place is a shit hole."
The ass replied, "Yes, but you still keep coming."
Why do people keep saying, "Why did the toilet paper not cross?" Because it got stuck in the crack, because it got stuck in their crack.
What's gassy and as cold as ice? Uranus.
A friend of mine chews gum, lays back to yawn, then chokes on the gum. Then I said, "God, what, you choking on dick?"
Knock, knock.
*takes out penis*
Who is there?
Butthole 😎
Fat kids are so fat, they have their own gravitational pull.
Your forehead is so big, it gets home 50 min before you do.
Brinnia so fat when she stepped on a scale, it said, "I need a bigger one."
Why do tampons have strings? So you can floss your teeth when you’re done eating.
I work at a morgue and we wrap the bodies in bubble wrap.
I was working the night shift and just looking at the security cameras, but then I heard popping behind me!
What's worse than waking up with a penis drawn on your face?
Finding out it was traced.
What do you call a person with only one arm?
Half-assed.
Yo mamma so fat that she like that ocean, we haven't even explored 5% of her yet.
Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms.