Body jokes

(insert funny joke about a dick here).

Did you laugh? Be honest.

A hand job from a deaf person counts as oral.

What do my balls and emos have in common?

...Nothing, they both hang themselves...

Why did he go to the chiropractors?

To get his spine fixed.

Butt hehe.

I saw my sister sucking a big toe.

How many balls do you have on your body?

2. Your butt.

Sally had 9 pounds of boobs (9), which was 2 2 many (922), so on the 9th of the month (9229) at 6pm (92296) on 68 street (922968), she went to doctor x to get 6 operations (922968x6) and left her (flip your calculator) boobless.

I'm gonna eat a hell of a lot of popcorn kernels before I die just to make the cremation a little more interesting.

If you can’t touch your brain or see your brain, you don’t have a brain?

Store owner: You have to be 40 inches tall to go into the adult section.

Kid: Please.

Store owner: Oh okay, but get on your tippy toes.

Kid: Everybody is hugging.

I accidentally sucked my own ball sack.

Yo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.

Yo mama's armpits are so hairy, it looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.

So, my mom was talking to me and told me to go to the store. When I get there, there’s a sign, but then someone tells me that’s just someone with a ginormous forehead.

Meat stands for: M - monitoring, E - evaluating, A - assessing/addressing, T - treatment.

So when you're shoving meat up people's asses, then you're monitoring them, evaluating them, assessing them, and treating them.

I find that a lot of butts CRACK me up.

I heard that your forehead is so big that you could build a neighborhood on it.

What do you call a guy at your doorstep with no arms and no legs?

Matt!

Well, we've removed all of the excess fat from your body, and all that's left, I'm afraid, is the wig, Mrs. Trump.