Body jokes
What do you call nuts on a chin?
My penis in your mouth.
Did you hear about the guy who got his entire left side cut off? Well, he's dead.
You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.
A woman noticed her husband standing on a bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. "Ha! That's not going to help!" she said. "Sure it does," he said. "It's the only way I can see the numbers."
Hey Ryan, what do you call a wall so large no man can conquer?
Answer: Ryan's forehead.
What did the poo say to the ass?
"I left you."
What has three balls and flies through space?
E.T. the extra testicle.
Don't listen to people when they say you have a dad bod. You don't.
You have a father figure.
How much do the bones in your body weigh? A skele-ton!
What is the similar thing between alcohol and anal sex?
They are not for kids.
Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand?
A: So she can moan with the other.
Q. Why do Skeletons work hard?
A. 'Cause they want the BONEus.
What did one skeleton say to the other?
Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"
Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)
Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."
Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"
Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"
I asked my doctor if it was normal for one of my nuts to be bigger than the other two.
Why do midgets run on balls?
Because the grass tickles them.
I need a new butt. This one has a hole in it.
Yo mama has such a big forehead, she is the CEO of foreheads!
You're so ugly you scared the crap out of the toilet!
My ass itches.
What's thick, 12 inches, and in your mum's throat?
My penis.