What's the best way to remove gum from hair?
Cancer.
What's the best way to remove gum from hair?
Cancer.
Why did Bob fall off the swing while playing? Because he had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
Not Bob.
One day, Little Susie got her monthly bleeding for the first time in her life.
Not quite certain what was happening, and somewhat frightened, she decided to tell Little Johnny. Little Susie dropped her panties and showed Little Johnny what was happening.
Little Johnny's eyes opened wide in amazement. "You know," he said, "I'm not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"
What do you call a woman with three boobs? Tres leches.
What do you call the girl with no arms and no legs?
Names.
A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."
Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington's nose.
Confucius say, "man who go to sleep with itchy bum, wake up with smelly finger."
You're so skinny that you use Chapstick as deodorant.
What part do people slit the most?
Everyone.
Joe mama so fat she went wearing high heels and came back in flip flops.
Never break a girl's/boy's/someone's heart. They only have one of them.
Break their bones instead. They have 206 of them.
At first, I was a boy trapped in a girl's body, then I was born.
What did the dick say to the condom?
Cover me, I'm going in. 😚😏
What did the girl say to the man with a moustache?
I moustache you a question.
What is the only warm organ in a dead woman?
My dick!
There's something on your chin... no, the 3rd one.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel.
I didn't like having long nails, but they're growing on me.
Dr. Brody: Sir, your son has a disease called boofa.
Dad: What's boofa?
Dr. Brody: Both of these nuts in your mouth.