Body jokes
I was going to talk about your chin, but I wasn't sure which one to write about.
(Best pick-up line ever). Your body is like 9/11. I wanna crash into your twin towers. đ
What do you call lesbian sex during their period?
A blood transfusion.
Why was the two-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the meat section from the dairy section.
What's the difference between a priest and a pimple?
A pimple will wait until you're 12 years old to come on your face.
Memes
Which animal has the largest chest? A Z-bra.
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Because she had no arms."
"Why couldnât she get up off the ground?" "Because she had no friends."
"Knock knock." "Whoâs there?" "Not Susie, sheâs still on the ground."
"Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?" "Everywhere."
"Why couldnât Susie scratch her leg?" "Because it was in a different body bag."
"Why did Susie drop her ice cream?" "She was hit by a bus."
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Someone threw a refrigerator at her."
Vagina jokes arenât funny, period.
What's the best way to remove gum from hair?
Cancer.
Why did Bob fall off the swing while playing? Because he had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
Not Bob.
What do you call a woman with three boobs? Tres leches.
What do you call the girl with no arms and no legs?
Names.
A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."
What body part do pigs have that humans donât have?
A hambone.
Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington's nose.
Confucius say, "man who go to sleep with itchy bum, wake up with smelly finger."
What is the only warm organ in a dead woman?
My dick!
Never break a girl's/boy's/someone's heart. They only have one of them.
Break their bones instead. They have 206 of them.
Joe mama so fat she went wearing high heels and came back in flip flops.
Bro, tampons look like sperms, and they go up your coochie.