Body jokes
My hips can't move, but Heineken.
What's red and runs up your leg?
A homesick abortion.
What is the difference between kinky and perverted?
Kinky is when an abled-bodied gay male is receiving an anonymous blow job from a physically disabled gay male under the handicapped stall at a rest area.
Perverted is when an abled-bodied gay male has to give a Klondike Bar to a physically disabled gay male to receive an anonymous blow job under the handicapped stall at a rest area.
I have a penis, and sometimes I bite it.
Is that ass a water barrier 'cause dam[n]?
I go to Venus to get a bigger penis.
Your mama is so fat, when scientists discovered her, they thought it was a new galaxy.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
Why can't orphans go on field trips?
They don't have anybody to sign the form.
What do my balls and emos have in common?
...Nothing, they both hang themselves...
I ate Taco Bell last night. I pooped out your hairline.
I got caught fucking a dead body by my family. RIP grandma.
My ass itches.
You're so skinny, you can barely fit through a door crack.
Penis, peepee, poopoo!
What does grass and Rachel Sutherland’s wrists have in common: nothing, they both get cut.
They are hairy.
I’ve been told I’ve got a perfect cock. She sure was hard on me when I cut it off, though.
What did the egg who was sun bathing say to the other egg? Don't look at my crack!
Hey, do you remember that dragon thing?
Draggin' these balls across your face.