My arm has a different texture than the rest of me, lol.
You're so fat when you told your mum and dad, even they laughed!
Sex is basically math. You add the bed. Subtract the clothes. Divide the legs to multiply inside.
Sometimes I look around and all I see is two fat cheeks in my face and say, "Too mushy apples."
(Best pick-up line ever). Your body is like 9/11. I wanna crash into your twin towers. đ
Male Patient: So, I just pull my pants down and bend over for this prostate exam?
Doctor: Yep.
Male Patient: Ok, I'm ready. Hey! That doesn't feel like a finger.
Doctor: Yep, and I'm not even a doctor.
Whatâs the difference between a fetus and a woman?
A fetus has more rights.
I yo yo-yo yo-yo yo-yo, yo-yo yo-yo you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you ha! Frick, fuck, gosh dang, youâre so big that you canât ride. This is Builder.
My thighs have a different texture pack than the rest of me.
There once was a man who beat his wife, And before he even knew it, he ended her life. His hands were a mess, all red and bloody, He had to find somewhere to hide the body.
You're so fat when you walk into the mall, you *are* the mall.
You don't have to worry about running while boys are around. Even I can't see anything there.
When your boy tries to have a bad day while you're on your period:
Oh, you have a cold? How rude of me. I just laid an egg, and now my body is ripping down the walls of my uterus. But can I get you a tissue?
Yo ass so fat that you can't see your toes.
When you go to the movies, you take up seven rows.
Beethoven composed his whole life.
What did he do in the afterlife? He decomposed! Har har har har har har.
When you ask for plastic surgery, they said, "We could not fix you, but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face."
You're so fat,
when you stepped on the scale,
Buzz Lightyear came out and said,
"To infinity and beyond!"
The earth used to be flat.
Till they buried yo mama.
Your forehead got a restraining order from your hairline.
I was going to talk about your chin, but I wasn't sure which one to write about.
