Blow jokes

What's the only time women are doing real work? When they are giving blow jobs.

Pass around the roses, their casket full of hoses, crash it, watch it, the water! OH SHIT IT'S GONNA BLOW!

What's the similarity between your mum and West Ham?

Your mum blows spunk bubbles from her ass.

Daughter: Hey Dad, can I use your car?

Dad: Sure, but first you have to give me a blow job."

Daughter: Okay, (proceeds to service dad). Dad, ewww, your dick tastes like shite!"

Dad: Oh, that's right, I lent your brother the car.

A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"

Hurricane Irma, it blows.

Why do women fart when they pee? To blow dry.

My sister is so stupid, she thought LBJ was a blow job.

If brains were dynamite, BLESSEDBRIAN wouldn't have enough to blow his nose.

Ferb is older than Phineas because his last line.

Ferb: "I’m boutta blow this sh*t!"

What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?

Hold on to your nuts; this ain’t no ordinary blow job.

Why do terrorists like the Twin Towers?

It's the next thing they blow up.

Hello people, my name is Osama.

I'm back from the dead and I want to blow you.

It's gonna take a step stool to get a blow job.

He huffed and he puffed, but instead of blowing the house, he choked it down with his mom.

I'm the type to blow up half of my house to kill a spider... and still miss.

Why did the suicide bomber get promoted?

Because he was blowing up at work. 💀😈

What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree?

Hold on to your nuts, this one's gonna blow!

Do you remember blowing bubbles when you were younger?

Well, Bubbles is back in town and was asking about you!

Sat at a busy intersection with a slice of bread, waiting for a traffic jam.

Cut a hole in the rug so he could see a dirty floor show.

He took hay to bed to feed his nightmare.

Took a tape measure to bed to see how long he slept.

Put his nose out the window so the wind will blow it.

Died with his boots on because he didn't want to hurt his toes when he kicked the bucket.