Blind jokes
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.
So, a blind man got run over by a car... a parked car.
Why can’t blind people sing [if] that can’t hear because they can see the lyrics?
Why couldn’t the house see?
The blinds were down.
Why did Sally run into a tree?
She is blind.
How do you punish a blind kid?
Move to a new house.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They stuck her in a round room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
Who is the blindest person in the world?
What do you call a blind author?
A Braille writer.
Wife is texting husband:
"Honey, if I give you 300 dollars, will you stop being blind?"
Husband: "seilghsielguG"
Wife: "Seriously, David?"
Husband: "fuweyadb"
What do blind people take for granted? Sight.
What’s black and rings the doorbell?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
If a CEO goes blind, are they just an EO?
A blind kid was talking to me because he was getting bullied...
I told him, "Just tell them what you see!"
How do you punish a blind kid?
Rearrange the furniture.
Why did the blind kid drop his ice cream? He got run over by his mom.
Last week was my blind friend's birthday. I thought I would give him something really good that he may need.
As I walk into his house and give him a cheese grater for a birthday present, he sets it next to him. As weeks pass, he comes up to me. He said, "That present that you gave me for my birthday was the most intense book I have ever read!"
Why can’t the blind man find love?
It’s called love at first sight.
A dad tells his son, "Stop masturbating! If you do it too long, you will go blind."
The son replied, "Dad, I'm over here!"
What's the difference between a blind person and an orphan?
They both can't see their parents.