Black jokes
What do you call a skinny black dick? A Tootsie Roll.
What's black, anorexic, dumb, and will never get a girlfriend?
Me.
What do you call a black hole?
Butt hole.
In communist Russia there is no discrimination. White, black, African, American, British and Asian. They all go to Gulag eventually.
"Stop being racist. You wouldn't put that for blacks."
What's long, black and full of seamen? A submarine.
Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump, and Angela Merkel are standing at the shore and are trying to impress each other with the accomplishments of their countries. Putin brags, "We have nuclear submarines which can stay underwater for six weeks without having to resurface!". Trump goes on, "Six weeks? That's nothing. I have the best submarines, they're underwater für at least three months!". Merkel is about to respond, when a giant steel colossus emerges from the sea. A hatch opens, a black uniform appears - "Heil Hitler! We need Diesel."
What is black and white and is dead?
My Chemical Romance.
A man walks into a bar. He takes a seat and asks the barman if he wanted to hear a blonde joke. The barman replies, "Before you tell this joke, I want to tell you something. See the woman over there? She is a black belt in karate, she's blonde. See the bouncer over there? He is also a blonde. See the chick over there with that pool cue? She is also blonde. Also, I have a shotgun behind the bar. I'm blonde. So do you still want to tell your joke?" He replies, "F**k that. I ain't explaining the joke 4 times."
What's long, black, and sticky?
A stick.
What do you call a white man having intercourse with a black woman?
An Oreo.
Oof.
What's black and red and goes 90 miles an hour? A baby in a blender!
Does anyone know Wakanda movie is Black Panther?
*bowl of dark grapes*
Friend 1: I like my grapes how I like my men.
Friend 2: Black? Good one.
Friend 1: 21 at a time.
Trump says to Obama, "You know it’s the White House, not the black house, right?" And Obama says, "Yeah, but it isn’t the orange house either."
There's four people on a roof: a Mexican, an Asian, a black guy, and a white guy. The Mexican walks over to the ledge and says, "This is for my people," and jumps off. The Asian also walks over to the ledge and says, "This is for my people," and jumps off. Then, the black guy walks over to the edge and says, "This is for my people," and pushes the white guy off.
What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you've told her twice.
What's black, white, and red?
A nun that fell down an elevator shaft.
I like my coffee like my men, long and black.