Birth jokes

I once gave birth to 3 children.

What's the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus's birth date.

Your forehead's so big, when you were being born, the doctors thought you had no face.

I was gonna say when you were born your mum saw you and screamed, but I remembered you were adopted...

When a pregnant lady gives birth, it looks like she is having an erection.

Hey, wanna hear an abortion joke? Never mind, I can't deliver it.

Your mom is so old that her birth certificate says "expired."

It must have been a sad day when you slithered out of the abortion bucket.

Your adopted.

Were you born on a highway? Because that is where most mistakes happen.

I know everything about Walt Disney! How he died, how his mom and dad died, how his kids died, when he was born, where he was born, and how he was born. 😏

Yo mama so hairy, you got carpet burn when you were born.

Little off topic but...

Mum: You wouldn't be here without me.

Son: And my birth certificate is a sorry letter from the condom factory.

Mum: Fair point.

What are the similarities between an orphan and a newborn plant?

Both their parents were separated.

You were born on a highway in a car crash, I wonder why.

Once upon a time, three babies were born in 2015. She was always crying for 2015. He loves her birth date. 🤗😈🤗🤕🤒no🤗🤑😱😎🙌🙏🙈🙉🙊

Is it so? Do people get freedom?

Omega was born with Mammosbum in Mammam.

Yesterday, I tickled my granddaughter's feet.

She is being born in 2 months.

A girl walks in the room. She asks her mom, "Why's my name Flower?" Her mom said, "When you were born, a flower fell on your head." Brick walks in the room. Jasvidnqzkdvsosbd.

You're so short, when you were born, the doctor couldn't tell if you were a boy, a girl, or a Jimmy Dean pork sausage.