Bird jokes
Kid 1: "It's a bird!"
Kid 2: "It's a plane!"
Me: "It's a terrorist!"
What do the Twin Towers and Angry Birds' pigs have in common?
They always getting hit.
What do you call a prehistoric crow? Crow-Magnon.
Why couldn't an eagle do a barrel roll? It's oblivious, it's il-eagle.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
You sound like an owl.
Why do birds fly south?
Because it's too far to walk.
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
My friend has glasses, and we were talking about owls, and I told my friend to give an owl glasses. I told my friend that it'd be a spectacled owl!
Yo what quacking lacking? Looking for a ducking good time? I've got some one lines and knee slappers that ought to fix the bill. What happens flied upside down? It quacks up.
A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them.
"Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers, "Can't you see his tail is burning?"
What do you call a bird with no wings?
Moas didn't even know that existed!
What goes boo in a car with no lips?
What's a woodpecker's favorite kind of jokes?
Knock knock ones.
A chicken is delicious.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
Who who, I'm an owl.
The early bird might get the worm...
But the second mouse gets the cheese.
A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees. “I don’t want to know!” Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears.
Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong. “Oh, Pop,” Johnny sobbed, “For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you’re telling me now that grownups don’t really have sex, I’ve got nothing left to live for!”
Is that a bird? Is that a plane? It's a plane!
Why are eagles 🦅 bald?
Because they don’t wear wigs.
What do birds and children have in common?
If you shoot them, they die.