Bird jokes
Kid 1: "It's a bird!"
Kid 2: "It's a plane!"
Me: "It's a terrorist!"
What's a woodpecker's favorite kind of jokes?
Knock knock ones.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
Who who, I'm an owl.
What do you call a prehistoric crow? Crow-Magnon.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
You sound like an owl.
Why do birds fly south?
Because it's too far to walk.
Why couldn't an eagle do a barrel roll? It's oblivious, it's il-eagle.
What do the Twin Towers and Angry Birds' pigs have in common?
They always getting hit.
My friend has glasses, and we were talking about owls, and I told my friend to give an owl glasses. I told my friend that it'd be a spectacled owl!
Yo what quacking lacking? Looking for a ducking good time? I've got some one lines and knee slappers that ought to fix the bill. What happens flied upside down? It quacks up.
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
What do you call a bird with no wings?
Moas didn't even know that existed!
A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them.
"Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers, "Can't you see his tail is burning?"
A chicken is delicious.
What goes boo in a car with no lips?
The early bird might get the worm...
But the second mouse gets the cheese.
A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees. “I don’t want to know!” Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears.
Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong. “Oh, Pop,” Johnny sobbed, “For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you’re telling me now that grownups don’t really have sex, I’ve got nothing left to live for!”
Why are eagles 🦅 bald?
Because they don’t wear wigs.
Is that a bird? Is that a plane? It's a plane!
What's the difference between a mole and an eagle?
They both live underground, except for the eagle.