Bigness jokes
Can we have sex, because if we don't, I can't like you, big, thick booty!
So let's have sex in bed, you sexy woman, or behind a tree, because shoving my dick in your pussy is a very nice feeling while sucking your ass.
Yo mama so fat when she went to the movie theater, she sits next to everyone.
Sometimes when I'm sad, I remember I have a big dick.
How do you stop all homophobic heterosexual white men from using all public men's restrooms at a rest area?
Make sure that all public men's restrooms at the rest area are always occupied with gay men that have long and thick big cocks, regardless of skin color.
How is sex like air?
It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.
A man was almost about to drown. A boat said, "Do you need help?" And he said no.
After the boat left, another boat came to the sea, and they asked if he needed help, and he said no.
And he asked God, "Why didn't you help me?"
God said, "I sent you two big boats, you dummy!"
Yo mama has such a big forehead, she is the CEO of foreheads!
Why are you sitting down to pee? I don't have a good back and can't lift something big.
In kindergarten, we were starting to learn how to use "big kid words." On Monday, the teacher asked everyone to share what they did over the weekend, but we had to use big kid words.
Eventually it got to my turn, and the teacher asked me what I did over the summer. I told her I read a book. She asked me what book, and to remember to use "big kid words." I'll never forget the horrified look on her face when I replied with "Winnie the Shit."
What goes in small and soft?
And comes out big and hard?
A tea bag.
No matter how big the jar, there is one thing that can never fit inside it. What is it?
Your forehead is so big even Mega Mind knew you were smarter.
Your forehead is so big, they used it for the Berlin Wall and the USA border.
What would a heterosexual woman that is a whore do for $500.00 that a gay man would be willing to do for free for a heterosexual man at a glory hole?
Suck his big cock.
Putin is the only person whose country is bigger than his mind.
Your forehead is so big that it made Mona Lisa smile.
Dear NASA, your mom thought I was big enough.
–Pluto.
Why was 10 scared? Because it was scared of 9/11. And why did I have to take a fall? I have nothing to do with the big II.
Why do orphans say, "Go big or go home?"
So that way they feel important.
A note for my History Teacher:
Frick frack apple jack tic tac sick sack Mr. Khan and give him a big fat whack 'cause his teaching's got lack, his system I will hack and through the screen I'll give him a smack. I'll throw him on the clothing rack. On his seat I'll put thumb tacks, I'll break his momma's back... and he'll never come back.