Best Friend

Best Friend jokes

Orphan

  • Why didn't the orphans stay at the park for days? Because they had no one to pick them up.

    What's an orphan's best friend? A boomerang because it's the only thing that ever came back.

    Funeral

  • About a month ago, I was at my best friend’s funeral and I told him, "Bitches always come and go." He looked at me kinda mad, kinda confused, and said, "That’s my mom, dude."

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  • Nun

  • A sad guy called "nun" is crying next to the grave of his best friend called "month". "Month" got killed by a gay guy, and after that, "nun" got homophobic.

    While "nun" is sitting next to "month"'s grave, he heard a guy ask his friend: 《Do You Wanna Play A Game On?》 "Nun" got angry and he asked that guy: 《What did you just say to your friend?》 The guy answers: 《A game on, why?》

    "Nun" kills the two guys.

    🤔

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  • Friend

  • Here is a story, my best friend was Chinese, his name was Chong-king. I took him to a restaurant one day and he said, "I am Chong-king." I said I know your name is Chong-king, within a few minutes he just randomly died making weird noises and turning blue by every second.

    Anyone know what happened?

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  • Friendship

  • If a baby cow finds a wolf pup, they will be best friends, but when mummy wolf comes, it’s a fight, so the baby cow and the wolf pup made it a secret, but one day the mummy cow and the mummy wolf found out, but no one got hurt. In fact, the mummy cow and the mummy wolf got to know each other, and baby cow and wolf pup were very happy and played all day long. Their friendship will never break.

    -THE END-

    This was not a joke but a meaning: if you are different, that doesn’t change who you are and your friends are, so be yourself and don’t let people break your dreams, and don’t forget them either. So no matter who you are, don’t let people change who you are. 🐺🐮

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  • Lie

  • One day my ex-best friend lied about his computer dying when he left the call and watched YouTube.

    Dog

  • I'm Asian and there is a saying that dogs are man's best friends. They are my best friends because they keep me from starving.

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  • Friend

  • What do you call a best friend that smokes weed?

    A pothead. Just because he's your friend, you don't have to support his poor decisions. Jeez, what has America come to?

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  • Friend

  • My best friend is transgender; she transitioned from a man into a woman. I think it's courageous of her to take a pay cut like that.

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  • Dog

  • God creates dog.

    God: "You are man's best friend."

    Dog: "That's pretty sexist."

    God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"

    Dog: "....."

    God: "And chocolate kills you!"

    Dog: "🐶"

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  • Friend

  • So, my best friend's boyfriend broke up with her, and she started to cry.

    So I told her a "single" joke, then she said, "Go and fucking die, you insensitive bitch!"

    I later said, "Ugh, fine, as your BFF, I will break his body for you—happy now?"

    She said, "*sniff* yes."

    Dick

  • A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his best friend's a pussy, and his owner beats him.

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  • Disappointment

  • I was sitting in class, and the teacher said he wasn't disappointed in me and my best friend, but not so much in me.

    I looked at my best friend and said, "I'm a disappointment to the teacher, too."

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  • Hitman

  • A man finds out his wife is cheating on him with his best friend, so he hires a hitman to shoot his wife in the head, and his friend in the balls. The hitman charges $100 per bullet. The man agrees.

    Later, they set up, and the hitman looks through the scope and says, “I can save you $100!”

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