Behavior jokes

You should bully orphans. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

Daniel takes his frustrations out on Shaenaya and his sexual frustrations out on Arunima.

Today I saw my son lick out a tub of butter. I told him to make a sandwich without butter for a week (as a punishment). He said, "Okay," and licked the bread. "It's really easy to spread," he said. LOL!

What has 2 wheels and screams? A disabled [person] I dropkicked down the stairs.

Mom: ON THE PHONE WITH CHILD- Honey, is Dad late to pick you up again?

Child: No, Mum. Dad is here, but he is talking about me to Mrs. Lili, the math teacher.

Mom: Can you hear them?

Child: I think... they are watching a good movie.

Mom: Why do you think that?

Child: Because I keep hearing this *HOLDS ONTO PHONE* and clap, clap, clap.

Who can jump the highest?

Emo kids, some are still in the air.

Yesterday my mom forgot to go grocery shopping, and I was starving, so I kept opening the fridge about 100 times, but nothing new was in there.

Imagine everyone being hoes.

Why am I naughty?

Because I want to be....

I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...

Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...

I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...

When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.

What did the dad say to the kid?

Nothing, he went to get the milk.

Confucius say, "Man who sit in church and fart must sit in pew."

Why do you always high five the emo person? 'Cause you can't just leave them hanging.

Stupid Mary Jane was swinging on the swing.

Her momma said, "Stupid Mary Jane, don't swing so high, the boys will see your underwear!"

Stupid Mary Jane laughed and laughed. She knew she wasn't wearing no underwear.

What's the difference between a school bus and a cactus?

On the school bus, the pricks are on the inside, but on a cactus, the pricks are on the outside.

I'm like a rubber because people hit me as I can't feel.

My friends in my friend group say that I am quiet and I don't do anything bad. I proved them wrong by murdering the leader of it.

For all the online haters on me, comment here, be honest.

I decided today that I was going to do something with my life, something amazing, and I decided to punch a homeless man.