If you’re ever bored, then go outside and punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell, their parents?
What do you call a person who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
An emo went to high five a tree, and it left them hanging.
They told me throwing babies was bad, but guess what I did yesterday? I threw my baby cousin down the escalator.
So if you are bored, punch an orphan.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?🙄🙄
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when you push them down the stairs.
What do garbage bins and horny women have in common?
They wait to be filled with a big load.
Why did the suicidal man walk in front of the car? To get to the other side.
Why is it annoying to eat by basketball players? Because they dribble all the time!
What's the worst thing that can happen to schools?
Quiet kids.
I used to be in a special needs class, and the teacher sent a student (if you want to call them that) out to the hall for being late.
I asked her, "Why did you send James out to the hall?"
She said, "He was a little tardy."
I replied to her, "I thought they all were."
Why do orphans cause trouble at school?
So the teachers will call their parents.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was running from you, hehe.
Me: "What's the difference between an apple and an emo?"
Friend: "I don't know."
Me: An apple actually falls from the tree.
You're cheap; no one even pays attention.
If you’re having a bad day, just punch an orphan.
Who are they going to tell? Their parents?
Yesterday I wanted to look up the term "procrastination".
I swear, I'll do it tomorrow.
Gwen, why are you so nice?
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
Q: What do you call a cranky cow?
A: Moooooooody.
