Band jokes

Michael Jackson died of shock when he found out Boys II Men wasn't a delivery service.

Did you hear that Daft Punk came out with a cook book?

It's called "One More Thyme."

If Al Gore started a math rock band, it should be called Algorhythm.

What's the depressed person's favorite song?

Van Halen - Jump

Your hairline goes so far back it remembers the big band.

What is black and white and is dead?

My Chemical Romance.

Do you know Imagine Dragons? Imagine dragon these nuts across your face!

What's an orphan's favorite band?

Foster the People 😂

What’s Stephen Hawking’s favorite band? The Rolling Stones.

What do you call a mariachi band sinking in Mayonnaise?

Cinco De Mayo.

Q. What makes music on your hair?

A. A headband!

"Why did the band teacher get arrested?"

"For fingering a minor." Ahaha, so funny!

What’s a pedophile’s favorite band? Kids Bop.

What’s the name of the band in the gay bar?

A: Beers for Queers.

I had a broken vacuum, then I put a One Direction sticker on it and it suddenly sucked again.

What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite musical group?

The Who?

What song do you play at an emo kid's funeral?

Van Halen's "Jump."

I went to the pharmacy the other day. I tried to buy a pack of condoms, but I pretended I didn't have enough money to mess with the cashier.

I went back into the aisles of the store, got a pack of rubber bands and plastic wrap, bought them, and walked out. I loved the look on the cashier's face when they saw my decision.

Why do girls wear classic rock T-shirts? Because they are stupid little bitches who need to grow some fashion sense because wearing old shit doesn't make you unique.

Have you heard of Imagine Dragons (the band)? Imagine dragging these nuts across your face.