Bad jokes
Unfortunately, I had bad luck and faced infidelity.
Picture this: the bedroom door opens and I see my girlfriend in bed with two men...
I didn’t expect her to come back so early.
Isn't it ironic that the actually nice people tend to be suicidal?
Think about it: suicide exists to make sure bad people bother each other instead.
Why are priests so bad at racing? They are always in the 'little behind'.
I feel bad for the kids at Sandy Hook. All they wanted was books, but got magazines instead.
A doctor walks into the room and tells his patient, "I have some bad news for you. You really have to stop masturbating."
The man looks aghast and says, "Oh my God, doc, why?!"
The doctor replies, "I'm trying to examine you."
Imagine saying "my bad" instead of "sorry for your loss" at a funeral.
Beer Bottle: You break me, you get one year of bad luck!
Mirror: You kiddin' me? You break me, then y'all get seven years of bad luck!
Condom: Hahaha... (Condom walks off laughing)
My friends in my friend group say that I am quiet and I don't do anything bad. I proved them wrong by murdering the leader of it.
I told my friend to look at the clock, then I said, "Is this a bad time?"
Why was the North Tower a bad doctor when the South Tower collapsed?
Because the North Tower didn’t do CPR.
Why are blind people bad at catching things? Because they never see it coming.
Your hairline is so bad, not even God could save it.
Why are Nepalese bad at chess?
Because someone already killed their king!
I pushed my best friend's chair in class. Now I kinda feel bad that he was in a wheelchair.
When you tell your mom that she is bad at jokes, then she tells you, "Well, I made you!"
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
Why are uncles like curries?
Because bad ones hurt your asshole.
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
Because no one is there for them to pass [the ball].
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Your hairline is so bad that they used it as trenches in the World War.