Why are uncles like curries?
Because bad ones hurt your asshole.
What did the shirt say to the pants?
Belt.
My 1 year old nephew had a stroke. I know, sounds bad... but he would have needed to learn how to speak and walk anyways.
An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.
I said, βDonβt worry, your parents wonβt say anything.β
Why are all fat people bad drivers?
They are all hungover.
I feel bad for the kids at Sandy Hook. All they wanted was books, but got magazines instead.
Imagine saying "my bad" instead of "sorry for your loss" at a funeral.
Beer Bottle: You break me, you get one year of bad luck!
Mirror: You kiddin' me? You break me, then y'all get seven years of bad luck!
Condom: Hahaha... (Condom walks off laughing)
My friends in my friend group say that I am quiet and I don't do anything bad. I proved them wrong by murdering the leader of it.