An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.
I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”
What's green and bad for your teeth?
A green brick.
My 1 year old nephew had a stroke. I know, sounds bad... but he would have needed to learn how to speak and walk anyways.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
There was an exam music quiz question about Gary Glitter. Now, if there's anyone you don't want to associate with the phrase "shh, turn over, you've got an hour," it's him.
Shit, my bad. I should leave him alone, he just wants to settle down and have kids.
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
Your hairline is so bad that they used it as trenches in the World War.
Why are Americans so bad at class royals?
Because they already lost 2 towers.
"Kobe is known for fade aways too bad he faded away."
Man, your hairline is so bad it started from the beginning of the month to the end!
Why is Cinderella bad at soccer?
She keeps on running from the ball.
When your boy tries to have a bad day while you're on your period:
Oh, you have a cold? How rude of me. I just laid an egg, and now my body is ripping down the walls of my uterus. But can I get you a tissue?
Man: Aw man, I'm having a bad day.
Man's friend: Same.
Man: So why did you have a bad day? My brother got hit by the school bus.
Man's friend: I got fired as a bus driver.
Man: Oh great heavens!
If you mixed the Iraq wheat scandal with the basics card paying other people's dole to your wife and tumble dried it in a royal commission that made your priestly mates look bad, what would you get?
Tony Abbott's career.
Why was the North Tower a bad doctor when the South Tower collapsed?
Because the North Tower didn’t do CPR.
Why are blind people bad at catching things? Because they never see it coming.
Say what you want about Hitler, he wasn’t all that bad. After all, he killed Hitler.
Why are Indian people bad at Monopoly?
Because whenever they hit the corner, they build a shop.
A doctor walks into the room and tells his patient, "I have some bad news for you. You really have to stop masturbating."
The man looks aghast and says, "Oh my God, doc, why?!"
The doctor replies, "I'm trying to examine you."
I feel bad for the kids at Sandy Hook. All they wanted was books, but got magazines instead.
