Bad Jokes

Whats binladens favourite flavour of crisp , plain

A farmer told me that he wanted a couple of achors so I punched him in the teeth

BAD!!!!!!!

Why doesn't bread like warm weather? It gets toasty

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman.

Also I have the same Birthday as her so I have the pass.

A fan gave another fan a blowjob

Jim’s car is swerving all over the road so a cop pulls him over, “Step out of the car” says the cop, “I am going to need you to take a breathalyzer test.” “I can’t”, Jim responds “You see I have very bad asthma, that can set off an attack.” “Alright,” says the cop, “then you’re going to have to take a blood test.” “Can’t do that either,” Jim responds, “I am a hemophiliac, if a wound is opened, I won’t stop bleeding, and I could bleed to death.” “Ok,” the cop answers “then I will need a urine sample.” “Sorry,” says Jim “I also have diabetes, that could push my sugar count really low.” “Fine, so just come on out, and walk a straight line for me.” “Can’t do that either” responds Jim. “Why not?” Demanded the exasperated cop. “Well, because I’m drunk!”

I'm Gay

girl- mom, meet my boyfriend mom- meet my boyfriend girls boyfriend- dad is that you are you back from the supermarket with milk mom's boyfriend- uh gtg

Ligma

Balls

what was Stephen Hawking's favourite song?

Deja Vu

I was hit on by president kennedy, too bad i shot him down

What's the hardest part of eating bald pussy? Pulling the diapers back up when your done!

A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal". The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan". Years later Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."