How do you get 50 babies into a car?
You blend them.
Baby Jokes
Some babies may be delivered via stork, but some bigger babies are gonna need a crane.
What did the mom say to the baby?
When you were born your mother said, "Oh, what a treasure!" Your father said, "Yeah, let’s go bury it."
"Um, honey, I'm glad you're done, but um, WHO KICKED OUR BABY'S ASS?! I'M PRETTY SURE FACES DON'T BEND THAT WAY!!"
What did the substrate say to the active site?
"C'mon baby, we fit together, open my door lock to f**kin' key."
Why did you say hi? Babies don't talk.
Louie Fennell.
Jason Kenney has never worried about putting food on the table for his kids.
"Knuckle babies" don't eat.
Q. What's an aborted baby's favourite type of humor? A. ...
I'm so jealous of babies with anencephaly.
They can eat all the ice cream they want and never get brain freezes.
How many dead babies does it take to paint my room?
It depends how many bullets you have.
What's worse than waking up with a dead baby next to you?
Realizing you were so drunk that you made love to it the night before...
How long does it take for 10 dead babies to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.
What's the difference between a baby and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't scream when I put my meat in it.
Why did the Asian parents have an Asian baby?
Two wongs don't make a white.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is...
Once upon a time, three babies were born in 2015. She was always crying for 2015. He loves her birth date. 🤗😈🤗🤕🤒no🤗🤑😱😎🙌🙏🙈🙉🙊
What’s red and cries?
A skinned baby in a bag of salt.
What's the difference between limbs of babies and a dick?
I've never sucked on dicks.
