Baby jokes
What milk do orphan babies drink?
Not their mom's, though.
What's the difference between a baby and putty?
You can only eat one.
Hey, I broke up with your girl.
-Me: What? Why?
Wait, what?
-Me: You f**ked her, so it's your baby.
What happens when you put a baby in a blender?
The baby is a cherry smoothie.
What do you call a baby with red curry fried hair?
A baby using a potato peeler and a comb.
What's the similarity between a 14-year-old girl and the fetus inside her?
They're both thinking, "Oh fuck, mom is gonna kill me!"
Can't anyone relate to this? BEAT WATERSHARKY!!! -Oops!-By- Air Attack Productions and Yung Gravy-Ayy, supercalifragilisticexpiali dope shit Supercalifragi lick my ex be on some ho shit Superman, I get dem bands but ain't gon' buy you roses Super-duper get them cougars, took my wrist and froze it Super-duper hoes Y'all got Oompa Loompa hoes I ain't never knew ya hoes Prolly still ran through 'em, though.
Oh, wait, wait, I, I do know your ho? You talkin' 'bout, you talkin' 'bout Tracy? Nah, you mean like, like, Tracy with the ass? Tracy with the, with the Honda? Shit, well.
Oops, baby. Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy. Never knew that was your boo, baby. Hit her five times in the coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy. Oops, baby. Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy. I just tryna hit, it's my duty, baby. Sippin' on the goose, like Boosie, baby. Yeah, I said oops, baby. Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy. Never knew that was your boo, baby. Hit her five times in the coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy. Oops, baby. Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy. I just tryna hit, it's my duty, baby. Sippin' on the goose, like Boosie, baby.
Lil' bitch, I'm happy and I know it so I clap them fuckin' cheeks, yeah I'm happy and I show it to your momma in the sheets And I'm happy she's a freak ho, happy so my teeth glow Yeah, my bitch elite, I be clapping every week My neck, my back, got your momma on my sack My checks, my racks, it's the return of the motherfuckin' mack And I stay with the pack, though. Clap, clap, then I'm out the backdoor. Lil' Pillsbury, I stack dough. Walkin' with a limp, like a crack ho.
Yeah, I said oops, baby. Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy. Never knew that was your boo, baby. Hit her five times in the Coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy. Oops, baby. Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy. I just tryna hit, it's my duty, baby. Sippin' on the goose, like Boosie, baby. Yeah, I said oops, baby. Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy. Never knew that was your boo, baby. Hit her five times in the Coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy. Oops, baby. Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy. I just tryna hit, it's my duty, baby. Sippin' on the goose, like Boosie, baby.
Why was the baby Dinosaur an orphan?
His family was blown up by meteors.
How do you fit 1000 babies in a swimming pool?
A blender.
How do you get them out? Slurp them up with a straw.
What did the doctor say to the mother after delivering the baby? Sorry.
Yo mama so fat, cow!
How do you get a baby into a small bowl?
A blender.
How do you get it out? Tostito chips.
Instead of the line, "This girl's on fire," my friend can relate to, "The baby in the oven's on fire, and I need to take it the f*ck out!"
What’s a sheep’s favorite song?
"Baby Don’t Herd Me."
What's worse than throwing a baby off a cliff?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
The thing my mom birthed.
Two mums hook up!
Their daughter comes in the room and says, "Which one's the baby daddy?"
The "mum" points to the woman who was actually a man!
Baby Shark be like, "It's the END," bruh, they dead.
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because its uncles were all aunts!
Q. What's an aborted baby's favourite type of humor? A. ...