Baby jokes
You know a piranha can devour a small child in 30 seconds. Anyway, I lost my job at the aquarium today.
What did one aborted baby say to the other? Nothing. They're both dead.
Michael J. Fox isn't allowed around small children. When he touches them, he is immediately accused of shaken baby syndrome.
What did the spaghetti say to the sauce? Pasta la vista!
What did Sophie Brussaux's baby get every week?
A face full of sperm.
What is blue and sits in a corner? A baby in a baggy.
Lucas is a baby, a little girl, ooo!
Q: What do you call a baby in a vegetative state?
A: A tater tot.
What's the difference between a Doberman Pinscher and a Social Worker?
Eventually, you can get a baby back from a Doberman Pinscher.
When a baby was born to a slave, did the slave owners hang a "Bred in Captivity" sign above the crib?
What do you call a baby in the shower? A baby in the shower.
A baby penguin sat on an iceberg. The baby penguin watched the Titanic sink.
So you see all these Baby Yoda memes when you go online, But you have never really seen the show with him.
He is just SOOOO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You were born on the highway. That's where most accidents happen.
What's the difference between limbs of babies and a dick?
I've never sucked on dicks.
What's the same thing between a baby and a grenade?
They both make a sound when thrown.
What's cold, blue and makes women cry?
Cot death.
What do you call a baby that came out of their mother's womb? A virgin.
What's worse than finding one dead baby in a bin? Finding one dead baby in five bins.
My sister said that I am a baby, so I said, "Waa, waa."