At least jokes

I saw a man sitting on the ledge of a bridge the other day, and asked him what was wrong. He responded with nobody loves me, so i told him that may be true but you dont wanna kill yourself you want to die of old age, or at least be murdered, suicide is for the weak. he responded with your right so I pushed him over the bridge, and he died of murder

I adopted a dog. It's gone now.

At least homeless people in China are not starving.

Paul Walker's death was a tragedy, but at least he went out in a blaze of glory.

What does your first football game and your first time having sex have in common?

You were bloody and battered but at least your dad came.

Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*

Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?

Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~

What do you get when you mix an apple with water... applesauce. Wait, do not leave yet. If you are still reading this, you have been rekt, ha ha. At least I am still laughing.

My mum told me to stop playing with my sister. She said, "At least wait for her to be born first."

What's the difference between a feminist and a suicide vest?

At least one does something when it is triggered.

A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will win. Sadly, no pun intended.

If you ever have a gay friend whose comatose, tell his family he/she was a fruit. Now he/she's a vegetable, at least they're still in the produce section.

What's the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.

Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it... at least Jesus didn't get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.

How many dead strippers does it take to change a light?

At least 13 because my basement is still dark.

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? At least it was a soft drink.

What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.

OK, there are at least 3 pedophiles in your neighborhood.

But there are no pedophiles in my neighborhood; there are only three 10-year-old girls with juicy asses.

Old man goes to the doctor.

The doctor says, "The test results are back, and I'm sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer's."

The old man says, "Phew! At least it's not cancer!"

So a blind man walks into a bar.

At least he thinks so.