Asked Jokes

Me and my friend are walking we see a kid my friend asks him why he's crying and if he lost his parents he said yeah I slapped my friend because we were at an orphanage.

Yo mama so fat when the doctor saw her weight on the scale he said "I asked for your weight not your phone number"

I went to visit my childhood home I asked the owners if I could come in for some nostalgic memories, they said no and slammed the door on me, my parents are so mean.

Sometimes i get jealous when my phone dies.

Why? You ask. Because it only takes one charge to bring it back to life.

A guy and his girl just finished making love. Just as they lay next to each other, the girl asks "Have you thought about any baby names?". The guy then takes his condom off and ties it, and says "Well propably David Copperfield, if he gets out of this"

A missionary went to visit an orphanage in Thailand. After looking around, he asked the manager, "Why do these kids have numbers instead of names on their shirts? And why are some of them the same?" The manager smiled and said, "Those are price tags."

i told siri my dog and she told me if she could tell me a joke to cheer me up and i said okay.she asked me knock knock and i said who is there and she said not your dog

Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke and it asked me “what is the difference between a large pizza and you”one can feed a family

Two windmills stand at a farm. One asks the other what is your favorite kind of music. The other windmill replies, I'm a huge metal fan

i saw a girl crying i asked her were are your parents she cried as I got kicked out of the orphanage

I asked the emo kid how it was hanging.. he didn't reply bc the rope was too tight

Today I was asked what I wanted to be and I said I wanted to be a pinata bc I want to be hanged

I pushed an orphan and they said I’m telling I asked to who your parents?

In Denver, the members of a Sunday-school class were asked to set down their favorite biblical truths. One youngster laboriously printed: “Do one to others as others do one to you.” —Lee Olson, The Denver Post

A married woman asked her husband if he saw future then the husband answered her " I have no Eye dear"

I was an orphan as a kid but I have never had a bitch so I asked this cheerleader to homecoming and she said "Mofo you are only coming to hoco because you need a home to go to"

As an actor going to film a new TV show in another country, when TSA asks “what’s the purpose of your visit?”... “I’m going to shoot a pilot” is never a good answer