I asked my now ex-boyfriend why he’s scared of my cat. He said it was because of the scratches on my arm.
I told him that my cat doesn’t scratch, but he didn’t believe me. He realised what I meant when he noticed I kept hiding my wrist from everyone else.
(Kinda based on the fact that my ex is indeed scared of cats, and he has been scared of my cat, so yeah 😂)
What do you call a person with no arms and legs? You can call himm whatever you want he's not coming.
Armless guy: Even though I don’t have arms. I can do anything u normal people can do. Me: 🎵If you’re happy and u know it clap ur hands! 🎶
Yo momma's arm-pits stink so bad she made Right Guard turn to left.
What position would a man with no legs and arms play in baseball? Homebase
People are fighting in a war, and a man gets hit four times in the arm and says, "'Tis but a scratch!"
And the other guy, looking at him in shock, says, "A scratch? Your arm is off your body!"
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock. "Who's there?" Not Sally.
Where does Stephen Hawking go when he breaks his arm? PC World.
Why do emos cut their arms? Because they can't cut the rope.
I got one of those
Friend: you know how I like my women like my coffee.... Hot Me: what If you don't like coffee:(
bob has no arms knock knock, whos there, its not bob.
A: Why did Sally fall off the swing?
B: Why?
A: Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Not Sally.
Joe was eating ice cream while walking on the street. He dropped his ice cream. Why?
B: I don't know, why?
A: Because Sally was driving the car.
Why did James fall off the swing?
He had no arms.
Your arms are open. They stretch towards me, Reaching, grabbing, pulling me, Surrounding me, Drowning me in my helplessness. Time standing still, inside here. Looking through windows, time passing by. Let me go, will ya?
A kid decided to burn his house down.
His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm around the mom and said, "That's arson."
Butcher knives are great tools for cutting many things!
Fruit, vegetables, my arms.
I am armed with an automatic 4-OXD 22. caliber machine gun. HANDS IN THE AIR!
Little Johnny has no arms. Knock, knock, who's there?
Not Johnny.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To eat Bob's arms.
Bob went to hospital and had no arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Bob.
